Christmas ’07
You Can Never Be Too Careful. You Can Never Be Too Safe.
I’m using a public computer to compose this post, the very same computer I just used to visit clusterflock and from which I submitted a comment on my own Miss Crawley’s Monkey. Take a look. Go ahead.
Finishing War and Peace
When I say I have finished reading War and Peace, what I mean is that I stopped in Part Two of the epilogue, which is an essay about historiography and understanding history and so forth. Yawn. The characters vanish at the end of Part One of the epilogue.
But I give the book as a whole a thumbs-up, even though I couldn’t care less about Tolstoy’s ruminations on historical writing.
Those Freudian Slips Can Be Career Killers.
Snorting A Brain Chemical Replaces Sleep
In what sounds like a dream for millions of tired coffee drinkers, Darpa-funded scientists might have found a drug that will eliminate sleepiness. A nasal spray containing a naturally occurring brain hormone called orexin A reversed the effects of sleep deprivation in monkeys, allowing them to perform like well-rested monkeys on cognitive tests. The discovery’s first application will probably be in treatment of the severe sleep disorder narcolepsy.
Dear Clusterflock
Bad Santa–love it or hate it?
Miss Crawley’s Monkey
>Monkey owned by Miss Constance Crawley, an actress. Chicago, Illinois. 1908. Chicago Daily News, Inc.
Source: Library of Congress/Chicago History Museum.
Buffalo at the December Birthdays party
They celebrate the December birthdays with a cake and some two-liter sodas. The buffalo from the purchasing department gets emotional and spends the whole time crying quietly in the corner.
Christmas in New York
This is how we decorate for Christmas at my mom’s house:
Does the spider love the acrobatic Santas, or does the spider hate the acrobatic Santas? Discuss.
Wonder
It’s nigh on 4:00 am. I’ve just returned to Galena after a Christmas Eve party in Chicago.
And I’m here to tell you: A landscape covered with pristine snow is a wonder to behold when illuminated by a full moon.
I believe I’ll stay up till dawn.
Merry Christmas, Y’all
Daryl and I just got back from an internetless week in El Paso (hence our absence from clusterflock). This year’s version of the Scroggins Christmas letter is below the fold. It’s not as good as usual, but fuck it—they can’t all be winners.
Merry Christmas From the Family
One More Last-Minute Shopping Tip
Who doesn’t like those little vibrators-on-keychains?
Another Last-Minute Shopping Tip
“Santa knows the power of cheese.”
So it said last week on the marquee of the Gile Cheese (Factory Outlet) Store, Cuba City, Wisconsin.
A Last-Minute Shopping Tip
Posted by Cookie at Bedazzled.
Santa’s Pants – Scottish Falsetto Sock Puppet Theatre
Roses
I Rather Bang Screw!
Im a DUDE STOP sending me Messages about how hot i am you fucking f*@%!
What Koko Wants
Using sign language, Koko is able to communicate with humans. Over the years, Koko has repeatedly requested that female human visitors display their breasts to her. In fact, certain of Koko’s hand movements were interpreted as a “demand” by Koko to see exposed human nipples.
Invisible man
at lesbian birthday party.
(note to self: put toilet seat down.)
For Cindy
(link to “another” site I “liked”)
Giraffe in HR
The giraffe in Human Resources is a stickler for paperwork. One of the men in the office spits in the flavored creamer that she keeps in the staff refrigerator.
Christmas Goes Monthly In 2009
New York, NY — In a move universally applauded by beleaguered retailers, observance of Christmas has been expanded to occur on the twenty-fifth of every calendar month. Although this holiest of Christian holidays has spent the past two millennia as an annual observance, supporters of Monthly Christmas lauded the advantages offered by the new schedule, which begins January 25, 2009.
Pantone’s Color of the Year
Blue Iris: A mix of blue and purple that suggests dependability and magic.
Amy
