May 29, 2008
Ministry Starter Set Puppets
This might help Cindy with her Texas themed puppet ideas.
I’m ordering this Adventures in Nicotine Land set just to get the cigarette puppet:
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Thank you, Miss Amy. These are real nice–way too nice for a couple of self-deprecating sock puppets. We’ll be fine with some old dirty, holey socks. Don’t you worry about us. We aren’t as fancy as those scotch puppets (or “Scottish,” if you won’t to be stuck-up). But us and our socks are what the Good Lord made us to be, and I guess if it’s good enough for Him, it’s good enough for us.
Puppets. Ministry. Texans: any of y’all remember “Captain Hook” the Christian TV Pirate? Aaargh! A scurvy cable TV evangelist of the 1980s. I’d settled in the Midwest by the time he was sailing the airwaves, but through the miracle of technology his message reached souls even up in godforsaken Madison, Wisconsin. I deeply regret my failure to purchase his LP titled — is this right? — “Captain Hook A-Live in Texas”.
Aside from the bizarre Christian pirate motif, what I remember best is a Muppet-like sidekick of the Captain named “New-gene” by way of reference to the New Testament.
Shiver me fragments of the True Cross — a DJ on one of the border radio stations in my head just started playing “Captain Hook” ’s theme song. I hear it ever so faintly.
Sheila
Is your border station coming from the white noise of the furnace or an air conditioner? (Honestly, the weather we’re having!) A refrigerator? The dryer? Or is it your Sonicare ?
Solid Viper Records categorizes Captain Hook as a “Christian ventriloquist”.
I’ve known lots of Christian ventriloquists.
An actual exchange recounted to me by my grandmother (RIP):
Peggy came over said somebody took a camel right out’a her nantivity scene.
Well.
I know. Anyway, I had a extra camel so I gave it to her.
An actual utterance recounted to me by a friend, a man who grew up in Madison, Wisconsin, where he, along with his Scout troop, was press-ganged into hoisting a local church’s Nativity figures onto a rooftop site:
Scoutmaster to my friend, who was striving to lift a roped fiberglass figure of the magus Caspar, a traditional ‘Moor’:
“Hey, David! Take it easy with that colored fellow!”
Oh Sheila that’s great. Sing Willow–
Rick, I think what I’m hearing is being transmitted through the titanium post anchoring my fake tooth.
[...] stand corrected. The televangelizing, ventriloquizing Captain Hook was not, as I implied, a Texan (though he did release an LP titled “Captain Hook A-live in Texas”). He was a [...]
On occasion, when screaming babies are about, I’ve been known to (with all Christian love in my heart) say, “that sound made my teeth get a radio station.”
Don’t get me wrong, I love babies. But really, sometimes that squeal can send one to a sick, nearly incapacitating universe.
I felt for India, who, on her return from London and the Continent, reported that she wished she were dead when she found that she was sharing her row on the plane with a child and a baby.