August 2, 2008


I pull it out when it seems appropriate

There’s this [insert an individual from your favorite misaligned minority] guy who is hitchhiking along side the freeway. A Cadillac passes, then slows and stops. The guy runs up, gets in. “Hey, man, thanks.” he says. After a while, the guy says, “Hey, you know I couldn’t help noticing all the antennas on your car.”

“Yeah,” says the driver, “I got to keep in touch. You see that one on the right front fender?”

“Yeah?” says the guy.

“I can talk all over the city on that one. You see the one on the left front fender?”

“Yeah?” says the guy.

“I can talk all over the county on that one. You see the one on the back right fender?”

“Yeah?” says the guy.

“I can talk all over the state on that one. You see the one on the back left fender?”

“Yeah?” says the guy.

“I can talk all over the country on that one. You see the real tall one on the roof?”

“Yeah?” says the guy.

“I can talk all over the world on that one.”

“You know?” Says the guy. “I do anything to be able to talk to my mother in [name your favorite misaligned Eastern European country, from which this individual comes] I haven’t talked to her in years.”

“You’d do anything, hunh?” says the driver.

“Yes.”

The driver unzips his pants, takes out his cock, and says, “OK, get with it.”

The guy leans over, takes the driver’s cock in his hand, bends down… and says… “Hello? Mother?”

posted by Rick Neece in jokes 

comments

14 Responses to “I pull it out when it seems appropriate”

  1. Sheila Ryan on August 2nd, 2008 at 5:41 pm

    Rick. I am so hoping we get this Kansas City party together in October. Swap jokes.

  2. Kathy Hilen-Smith on August 2nd, 2008 at 8:48 pm

    Rick.

    Rick, Rick, Rick.

  3. Rick Neece on August 2nd, 2008 at 9:14 pm

    We’re gettin’ ready, Sheila. Y’all come on now, hear?

  4. Mike D. on August 2nd, 2008 at 9:38 pm

    And? Don’t leave me hanging here, Rick, what does his cock say?

  5. Andricon on August 2nd, 2008 at 9:44 pm

    Kansas City party, you say?

  6. Rick Neece on August 2nd, 2008 at 10:16 pm

    Mike D? A thousand pardons if my sentence were syntactically incorrect. The driver’s cock don’t say nothin’.

    Andricon (this is whispered…shhhhhh)

    *yeth, pothibly*

    Don’t know if I’ve seen you before, in and around these parts. Why might you be interested?

  7. Sheila Ryan on August 2nd, 2008 at 10:26 pm

    Corner of Twelfth Street and Vine. Bring your own bottle of Kansas City wine.

  8. Deron Bauman on August 2nd, 2008 at 10:41 pm

    Amy and I will be there. We’ll pick up the Scrogginses on the way and Renner if he’s around. Shit, I guess Brandon’s on the way too. Maybe Aaron and Cara can come up for the road trip.

    Who am I missing?

  9. Rick Neece on August 2nd, 2008 at 10:56 pm

    I’ll gather up some blankets for pallets. Don’t y’all disappoint, now.

  10. Brandon Hobson on August 2nd, 2008 at 11:26 pm

    Yup, sounds good.

  11. Andrew Simone on August 2nd, 2008 at 11:29 pm

    Shoot. I’ll take a bus over to KC from St. Louis, if I have to.

  12. Andricon on August 3rd, 2008 at 12:37 pm

    I mainly read, rather than comment, but when I find one of my favorite blogs is going to be in town, I’m interested.

    Also, if you could all dress up as the website, that would be amazing.

  13. Deron Bauman on August 3rd, 2008 at 3:51 pm

    I’m already dressed up as the web site.

  14. From the comments: Deron Bauman : clusterflock on August 3rd, 2008 at 8:27 pm

    [...] I’m already dressed up as the web site [...]

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