March 27, 2009

My Dead Texan

Today for our weekly manager’s lunch we met at “Swagger,” a new gourmet bar & grill not too far from the office. While we were waiting for everyone to arrive. I had a Bloody Mary. Just a fraction under “too spicy.” Delish. We ordered chili-cheese fries with jalapenos that made my bloody mary taste like plain tomato juice. I ordered a “Dead Texan and fries,” which is a third-pound burger, topped with bacon, a fried egg, lettuce, tomato, onion and jalapenos. For a bun it had two grilled cheese sandwiches made with Texas toast.

Y’all! I’m tellin’ you the BUN was TWO GRILLED CHEESE SANDWICHES!

I could only eat half, put the other half in the fridge here at the office. Somebody’ll eat it.

posted by in adventure, alcohol, food, poop | * | 28 comments 

comments

  1. Lucy Foley on March 27th, 2009 at 2:19 pm

    And they thought Elvis’ tastes were avant garde.

  2. Lucy Foley on March 27th, 2009 at 2:20 pm

    Rick, tell me you had some kind of camera with you. At the very least, you have a half sandwich in the fridge, which will buy you time.

  3. Sheila Ryan on March 27th, 2009 at 2:42 pm

    Texas toast. Rick, there are a lot of folk who don’t know what Texas toast is.

  4. Rick Neece on March 27th, 2009 at 3:04 pm

    I’ll post one up in a little while.

  5. India on March 27th, 2009 at 4:56 pm

    So, this is what passes for “gourmet” in your land?

  6. Sheila Ryan on March 27th, 2009 at 5:03 pm

    Texan mort avec frites.

  7. Boricua in Texas on March 28th, 2009 at 7:38 am

    Yup, sounds just like Texas.

  8. Robert Ledgerwood on March 28th, 2009 at 9:07 am

    That’s only twenty minutes from my house, I’ll have to check it out.

  9. Rick Neece on March 28th, 2009 at 4:35 pm

    Robert, you will have to check it out. I took Danny there for lunch today. I had the “Fidel Castro,” Pulled pork, swiss, dill pickles, dijon on a panini pressed hoagie roll. Danny had fully-loaded-baked-potato fries with a side of chili. Food rocked. Danny loved it. (And he’s not easy to please.)

  10. Sheila Ryan on March 28th, 2009 at 5:03 pm

    Pulled pork and pickles. Oh, Rick. Paradise.

  11. Phil Bebbington on March 28th, 2009 at 5:13 pm

    Rick, that sounds like quite a mouthful, if you’ll pardon the expression!

  12. Rick Neece on March 28th, 2009 at 6:11 pm

    It was and I will pardon, Phil. Yes, Sheila, heaven. Again I only ate half, not sure what that says about me. ‘Cept I’m gettin’ fat and really, really ought to watch it.

  13. Phil Bebbington on March 28th, 2009 at 6:14 pm

    I seem to remember a mouth full of pulled pork in a restaurant in Lincoln, IL. Empty at 8pm and a waitress that glided rather then walked – it was most unsettling but, pulled pork makes much Okay!

  14. Lucy Foley on March 28th, 2009 at 6:17 pm

    You people are all crazy.

    Cindy! I’ve got the caravan ready to go. Grab 24 hours’ worth of tofurkey and we’re gone.

  15. Phil Bebbington on March 28th, 2009 at 6:19 pm

    Lucy, might I recommend Iowa if it is fun you are looking for!

  16. Lucy Foley on March 28th, 2009 at 6:20 pm

    Cindy don’t listen to any of these people. Just look straight ahead, clutching your tofurkey and get into the wagon.

    Sheila, you can come, but you’ll have to stuff your pork outside the wagon. That is the deal.

  17. Sheila Ryan on March 28th, 2009 at 6:20 pm

    Or corn.

  18. Rick Neece on March 28th, 2009 at 6:21 pm

    Let’s go off topic a bit. Danny’s favorite restaurant story. A waitress at the Village Inn in Tulsa at 2:30 in the morning. Served the table of TGI Fridays employees, of whom Danny was part at the time, after late-shift, with four words.

    “Coffee?”
    “Ready?”
    “OK?”
    “Check?”

  19. Cindy Scroggins on March 28th, 2009 at 6:32 pm

    Oh, Lucy!! I’m over here, in the corner. I’m afraid to come out. I have a bag of Tofurkey and an 8-quart tub of hummus. Just swing by South Congress and Academy St. in Austin. No need to slow down, I’ll just jump on and roll.

  20. Lucy Foley on March 28th, 2009 at 6:36 pm

    Ok I’ve got us three very laissez faire cats holding up the front. I’m trying to talk to them firmly. This could take some time. I’m doing the best I can, Cindy. All I can say is that they purred in the presence of the KitchenMouse yesterday. Also, they think Tar, our bear-like german shepherd, is the cutest thing that ever lived. I will try.

  21. Lucy Foley on March 28th, 2009 at 6:37 pm

    So you know, be as stylish as you want with the jumping on. There is no hurry.

  22. Lucy Foley on March 28th, 2009 at 7:02 pm

    Fuck it they’re still purring, Cindy. They’re doing that patronising closing-their eyes-indulgently thing at me. Cindy, our steed is purring. I don’t know what to do now.

  23. Boricua in Texas on March 28th, 2009 at 7:02 pm

    The FIdel Castro sounds like an updated version of a sandwich cubano, which is usually roast pork, swiss cheese, pickles and mustard on French bread. We eat a lot of those in my native Puerto Rico. It’s a classic.

  24. Cindy Scroggins on March 28th, 2009 at 7:04 pm

    Oh, Jesus. Okay, don’t panic. Breathe. Breathe. Okay, do have any squirrels handy? I’ll try to talk you down.

  25. Lucy Foley on March 28th, 2009 at 7:07 pm

    I don’t think I’ve ever seen a squirrel around here. Only Brooklyn and Kew Gardens that time.

    Goddammit I got the wagon all you know, nice and everything and this was going to be really fucking cool. The cats said they were professionals, what the hell was I to know? They seemed authoritative.

    This is a fucking terrible situation.

  26. Cindy Scroggins on March 28th, 2009 at 7:36 pm

    There’s nothing to do now but drink.

  27. Lucy Foley on March 28th, 2009 at 7:42 pm

    That and catnip.

  28. Sheila Ryan on March 28th, 2009 at 7:59 pm

    And hot dildo soup.

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