August 22, 2009

the clusterflock store

The apartment is also the headquarters of a glossy fashion and literary magazine called Dossier, a biannual that Ms. Parrott founded and runs with her business partner Katherine Krause…

The tiny store on the garden level is run by Ms. Krause and Ms. Parrott… It is named for the magazine and is, in a sense, its incarnation as a retail establishment…

“The store is the magazine that doesn’t get published,” Mr. Friedman said.

A great idea. What would be in the clusterflock store?

comments

  1. Deron Bauman on August 22nd, 2009 at 10:51 am

    trucknutz.

  2. Amy Mabli on August 22nd, 2009 at 10:58 am

    bikenutz, taxidermied poodles, cakes, good books, and whisky

  3. Michael Smith on August 22nd, 2009 at 11:08 am

    Locks of Cooper’s white chest hair.

  4. Deron Bauman on August 22nd, 2009 at 11:10 am

    shaving kits.

  5. Dave Vogt on August 22nd, 2009 at 11:21 am

    can I get a pair of less-than-late-model entry-level-luxury-sedannutz?

  6. Sheila Ryan on August 22nd, 2009 at 12:22 pm

    Pasties. Goat cheese. Pork.

  7. India on August 22nd, 2009 at 1:19 pm

    Marzipan in big-ass tubs, like how they sell manteca in places like El Paso.

    Cat toys.

    Popsicles.

    Texas toast.

  8. Cindy Scroggins on August 22nd, 2009 at 2:37 pm

    Frozen swan heads
    On the lam kits
    Plastic sticks for proper popsicles
    Pussy shavers
    K-Mart pregnancy tests
    Drumsets for jumping
    Illustrated chicken sex manuals

    All proceeds go to the International Squirrel Rescue Fund

  9. Sheila Ryan on August 22nd, 2009 at 3:23 pm

    Cindy, ‘frozen swan heads’ reminds me of a song composed by me and myfriend Ed and his sister Susan back in the wayback. Soon as I can once more post easily, I will post what lyrics I recall.

  10. Sheila Ryan on August 22nd, 2009 at 3:36 pm

    It is a song about coprophagia. And pretty swans. On the lake.

  11. Sheila Ryan on August 22nd, 2009 at 3:38 pm

    India: Cat toys? — As: live mousies?

  12. Cindy Scroggins on August 22nd, 2009 at 5:37 pm

    Coprophagia. All the best songs are about it.

  13. Lucy on August 22nd, 2009 at 6:03 pm

    Prints, books, albums, documentaries, original art, cakes and litter trays by Clusterflockers. Curated shows of stuff we like, also specially featured designers, musicians, food and cultural products. Things Clusterflockers have made, designed or worked on.

    There would also be a hang out area with tea and coffee and a biscuit tin. In-store gigs, events and exhibitions. Weddings, occasionally, with Clusterflock-sourced catering. Perhaps an above-the-shop office area where various Clusterflockers could pool their resources and skills, a kind of one-stop-shop for clients to have their book designed, copyedited, translated, have a website made, garden and vegetable patch consultations, etc.

    We would have a compost heap out the back and a live performance every Friday evening. There would be a thrift store element. Vintage clothing would feature. We would hold a raffle for a different Ferrari every month. We would drive around in a cat drawn wagon, publicising the store and giving away crack daffodils for Jesus, in the early springtime.

  14. Rick Neece on August 22nd, 2009 at 6:38 pm

    Your vision is beautiful, Lucy. Perhaps I could lend a hand doing show-windows?

  15. Lucy on August 22nd, 2009 at 6:41 pm

    The class of back-in-the-day-Saks. That is exactly what we need, Rick.

  16. Sheila Ryan on August 22nd, 2009 at 6:42 pm

    And perhaps I could handle the crack daffodil end of things.

  17. Lucy on August 22nd, 2009 at 6:43 pm

    They do need careful tending.

  18. Sheila Ryan on August 22nd, 2009 at 6:48 pm

    Careful tending is something I am almost too good at.

  19. Daryl Scroggins on August 22nd, 2009 at 7:31 pm

    A great plan, Lucy. I’m there just by hearing it. I think we should have a sleeper wines section too, with amazing selections of champagnes (for instance) priced at $15 or less. And we need a section for abandoned animals that need a home, and a person planted in a nice chair right out front to give advice about all matters of taste. That’s where the champagne comes in.

  20. Lucy on August 22nd, 2009 at 7:37 pm

    That all sounds very good to me. Though a really good prosecco can be a revelation, I have found.

  21. Sheila Ryan on August 22nd, 2009 at 7:49 pm

    A good prosecco, yeah. And a gallery featuring the works of (non-human) animal artists. Attached sanctuary/art colony.

  22. Lucy on August 22nd, 2009 at 7:51 pm

    Right. Outsider animal artists. Exiled on so many fronts. I know a couple of seriously hot and talented female pooches who would be happy to come and make some guest appearances and lend a little pizazz to the proceedings.

  23. Sheila Ryan on August 22nd, 2009 at 7:52 pm

    Oh! Could I sit out front in the chair and give aesthetic counsel and cheesy fortunes?

  24. Lucy on August 22nd, 2009 at 7:54 pm

    We would be thrilled if you could do that.

  25. Sheila Ryan on August 22nd, 2009 at 7:57 pm

    Seriously! I could tell people what’s what when you’re talking art — and give them a load of ‘tall dark stranger’ malarkey in the bargain as well.

  26. Sheila Ryan on August 22nd, 2009 at 7:59 pm

    This is my calling! I live to embellish!

  27. Cindy Scroggins on August 22nd, 2009 at 9:39 pm

    Lucy, when Daryl says champagne, he’s including prosecco and other sparkling wines. Daryl has never been in the Bastille and doesn’t understand these distinctions. He doesn’t even know the difference between Jacques and Yves.

  28. Coop on August 22nd, 2009 at 9:40 pm

    I can ‘read the cards’. For a couple of years I was Swami Renner at school carnivals.

  29. Sheila Ryan on August 23rd, 2009 at 7:52 am

    Well, I can read tea leaves.

  30. Lucy on August 23rd, 2009 at 7:59 am

    Ok, Swami Renner and Mystic Sheila can slug it out amongst themselves for position of Chief Charlatan. Just try and keep it out back, by the compost heap.

  31. Sheila Ryan on August 23rd, 2009 at 8:03 am

    I will tell people whatever they want to hear. I will stop at nothing.

  32. Lucy on August 23rd, 2009 at 8:06 am

    Swami Renner is shirtless, though.

  33. Sheila Ryan on August 23rd, 2009 at 8:06 am

    Should I be Mystic Morag, do you think?

    Also, I want to wear a sexy costume that allows me to reveal my armpit hair.

  34. Lucy on August 23rd, 2009 at 8:20 am

    I think Mystic Morag and Swami Renner need to open their own consultancy up the block. I think you two could work the good cop/bad cop thing in a very lucrative way.

  35. Sheila Ryan on August 23rd, 2009 at 8:29 am

    Brilliant, Lucy! The Swami gives them his prophet-of-doom routine, and just as they are leaving, all disconsolate, I sidle up and murmur, “What is the matter? You seem . . . sad. Perhaps a cup of . . . tea?”

  36. Lucy on August 23rd, 2009 at 8:33 am

    It’s the stuff that dollar bills are made of.

  37. Sheila Ryan on August 23rd, 2009 at 8:45 am

    We’ll make more than enough to pay off the bunco squad. This is great. I have always wanted to be part of a fake swami racket.

    Swami Renner’s Spanish is good, and mine is passable, so we could operate a bilingual fake swami racket. Separate fools from their money in two languages!

    I am beginning to worry about my potential partner’s scruples, but I can probably assure him that we will make it clear to the suckers that what we offer is ‘entertainment’ only. Of course, I know better. I have no scruples. Lena ate my scruples.

  38. Lucy on August 23rd, 2009 at 9:06 am

    Might I suggest that Lena set up her own consultancy, eating people’s scruples? Word of mouth would spread quickly.

  39. Amy Mabli on August 23rd, 2009 at 10:13 am

    Shall we add to the inventory a package of stick-on apostrophe’s? An instruction manual would of course be included.