November 23, 2009
Cast y’all’s votes, y’all.
Should I be the next Oprah?
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comments:
- Joel Bernstein: The father responds
- Carole Corlew: Kathy, it’s in the blood! I have old windows in the garage that I use for that, too. And I...
- Kathy: Carole, you are so so like my father. He built his own mini greenhouse to start his seedlings using the frame...
- Michael Smith: Also, did you guys all know racquetball is fun? Even if you don’t know what you’re doing.
- Michael Smith: Cats don’t count.
- Carole Corlew: I also think about a principal’s message to parents here asking for donations of any used...
- Carole Corlew: Thank you! You know me, I have an agenda. I’m a garden-pusher. Erica, kale will grow very nicely...
- Rick Neece: Oh, and for the conflagation of CRV and Taurus? Well-played, I think.
- Rick Neece: We now have a hillbilly Town Car, eight years old. And a Saab, twelve years old. I’ll take the Saab...
- Rick Neece: Even at the time, that might have been a little harsh. I’ve driven a Jeep. It was a pretty nice...
- Rick Neece: Marco A few years back, Danny and I visited our friends Stephen and Jim on Michiana Shores. We drove our...
- Erica Braverman: Thank you, Carole. I’ve been trying to figure out how I’m going to start a small batch...
- Rick Neece: Me, too.
- Marco: Honda CRV been sleazin’ around with that hillbilly Ford Taurus.
- Deron Bauman: I’ve appreciated both your posts today. Beautiful.
you already are.
The Once and Future Oprah.
Dr. Sheila!
Maybe we could have Oprahs of the Month. I could be Oprah, then Lucy could be Oprah, and then Deron, and then Rick. And Cindy, then India, next Dave, and then Phil. Then Rick, and both Michaels, then Amy, and then Andrew. Kelsey, and Amanda Mae. Daryl, then Derek . . . and so on and on.
Cooper? The next Oprah?
Would you still be called Sheila? If so, then yes.
Yes, indeed, Phil. I would not be Oprah in name only.
I must confess. I think I would be a fabulous new Oprah, as I am a smart cookie possessed of ‘the common touch’.
When I’m the Oprah, I’m going to give everyone in the audience Maserati Quattroportes.
Will you also be recommending a book?
How come Rick gets to be the next Oprah twice?
Mistakes like that will get you canceled. As one of Daryl’s students once said in a paper, “it’s a doggy dog world.”
That was no mistake.
I did it on purpose — in the Pee Wee Herman vein.
I know you are [Oprah], but what am I?
“The Oprah.”
I know you are [Oprah], but what am I?
That will be the program’s tag line.
Phil, I apologize for the delay in responding to your query about book recommendation.
Yes, I will recommend a book. I will hector y’all to read Lolita.
I live in a doggy dog world.
When I am the Oprah I will recommend Daryl Scroggin’s “This Is Not The Way We Came In.” And I will have Mr. Scroggins on my show along with Steven Soderbergh. I will save the dispensing of the Maserati’s for last.
“When I am the Oprah . . . “
I will recommend “Mosefolket”, a collection of poems by one Cooper Esteban.
I hope to interview the poet and to entice him into droning at least one of his Ivor Cutleresque ditties.
*****
We are all Oprah.
*****
Mary Jeys would make an especially fine Oprah, though, don’t you think?
And, of course, above, I meant to say “Scroggins’s.” Also, when Mr. Scroggins and Mr. Soderbergh are talking I will gently suggest Mr. Scroggins’s book might be a perfect vehicle for George Clooney and Rene Zelleweger who might appear as the couple in the story about the horse with the secret note in the antique store. Then as a surprise, I will bring them out onstage to rip-roaring applause. The audience will not believe their eyes. They will squeal and weep. They will think that this is the best day of their lives and that nothing could make it better. Until, of course, I reveal the Quattroportes for all.
Hell, Rick, I want to be in the audience for that one.
Rick you dear man. I am thankful for you–your kindness and imagination always lift me, even when I’m feeling like Bill Murray giving his “prediction” in Groundhog Day.
That prediction being (for those of you who haven’t bothered to memorize the film): “It’s gonna be cold. It’s gonna be gray. And it’s gonna last you for the rest of your life.”
Daryl and I say this all the time. I’m thinkin’ we’re glass half-empty kind of people.
Truly Rick does deserve to be ‘the Oprah’ twice. At least.
“I know you are Oprah, but what am I?” What a great tag for the show!
Can I do your hair??
But what, Sheila, about your photophobia (that you share, I think, with me)??
On second thought, you did say that you’d gotten past that. That’s very good; you’re going to have cameras trained on you all the time.
Oy.
Pamela, not only can you do my hair, but you can be ‘the Oprah’ for at least one episode of “The ‘New’ ‘Oprah’ ‘Show’ “! Once I am Oprah, any friend or extended family member who wishes can be ‘the Oprah’ for a day!
And Rick Neece can be ‘the Oprah’ as many times as he pleases.