Typical Evening
We went to dinner last night at a nice neighborhood restaurant. As we were settling the bill, I noticed that the lovely young woman at the table next to us had ordered a bottle of wine (as we had)–though she was alone with her two children. My first thought was, damn, this makes me feel better about myself. My second thought was concern about her driving–judging by her high heels, there’s no way they had walked. My third thought was bafflement as she opened the youngest child’s drink cup and poured wine into it. We’re talking a two-year-old. That made me feel really good about myself, and really concerned about the woman and her kids.
So we drove home, and I heard a sound coming from our mail box. It was a card that had been mailed from Greece, and it was playing “Easter Parade.” From Phil, of course. It took us a good ten minutes to disable the thing. I suppose the card played off and on all the way from Crete! Mia asked who had sent it, and I told her, and she said, “Oh, I remember–the man from England. Pill!”
shell shock
Although the burns and shrapnel wounds that explosions can inflict are their most obvious hazards, perhaps the greatest danger comes from a blast’s shock wave. These rapidly generate ripples in a person’s innards, potentially causing traumatic brain injuries with deleterious effects ranging from a simple concussion to long-term impaired mental function.
Now scientists have uncovered a surprising possible way by which a blast might affect the brain — electric fields created when bone is hit by a shock wave.
spring has sprung
Spring comes about 10 days earlier in the United States than it did two decades ago, a consequence of climate change that favors invasive species over indigenous ones, scientists said on Tuesday.
The phenomenon known as “spring creep” has put various species of U.S. wildlife out of balance with their traditional habitats, from the rabbit-like American pika in the West to the roses and lilies in New England, the environmental experts said in a telephone news briefing.
“The losers tend to be our native plant species,” said Charles Davis of Harvard University, who studied plant changes in Concord, Massachusetts, where American conservationist and philosopher Henry David Thoreau lived a century and a half ago.
from the spam
Bring Near, noise block objective success suggest communication evening colour manner right service instrument
An Infographic Is Worth A Thousand Words
(GOOD)
Yours Truly, J.D. Salinger
The New Republic has a wonderful piece on the collection of personal letters written by J.D. Salinger to his close friend Michael Mitchell. Here, for example, is the old recluse outlining his thoughts on relationships and marriage:
For the last twenty years, and more, against very peculiar odds, despite quite a variety of interruptions, intrusions (a lot of them unnecessary and even malefic), I’ve been exploring things, looking into things with my writing, my fiction. What the result of it will ultimately be, I can’t say, and I’m not sure that it’s any of my business. The attractive assignment or task alone is what I wanted. … What I’m mainly trying to say, though, is that I’ve felt unable to afford the marvellous distraction of first-class friendship. … I’ve needed to stew endlessly, unrelievedly in my own juice. That sentence says it all, as far as I know. … Old goat that I am, I still occasionally propose marriage to anybody who passes by my window, but always under the same old selfish terms: that I don’t have to leave my desk, my scripts and my books unless absolutely necessary or convenient.
For Sheila
[http://www.clusterflock.org/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/tomorrowtoday.mp3]
(I didn’t see the first line clause until it was written and recorded.)
frying pan, fire?
Looks like the unpronounceable volcano that has shut down or disrupted international travel may just be the smaller cousin of another volcano that has erupted historically with its counterpart at least three times in the fairly recent past and is slightly past due for its next.
A Katla eruption would be 10 times stronger and shoot higher and larger plumes of ash into the air than its smaller neighbor, which has already brought European air travel to a standstill for five days and promises severe travel delays for days more.
The two volcanos are side by side in southern Iceland, about 12 miles (20 kilometers) apart and thought to be connected by a network of magma channels.
Katla, however, is buried under ice 550 yards (500 meters) thick — the massive Myrdalsjokull glacier, one of Iceland’s largest. That means it has more than twice the amount of ice that the current eruption has burned through — threatening a new and possibly longer aviation standstill across Europe.
The good news, Katla would be easier to pronounce.
from the comments
Yes, but few people know that body lice wear clothes. Early on their ability to mimic their environment evolved to generate structures that appeared to be loincloths, and later chitenous appendages resembling shoes began to appear. This hypersensitivity to appearances was made doubly absurd by the fact that they predated the magnifying glasses needed to observe such things. Only recently has the evolutionary strategy implicit in this mutation become clear: We are now able to observe the clothing of lice, and we have discovered that their fashion sense is far ahead of our own. A congress of well-known designers was recently invited to hover about a stereo microscope and then to comment–and participants who didn’t instantly dissolve into tears left quickly, issuing instructions to assistants as all were swept away in limousines. And lately, a style of blouses rife with a purple flame of cilia has become the rage. As for shoes–well: humans walking in the new ones never fall down and must constantly fight off unwanted sexual partners.
body lice evolved as humans began to wear clothing
Using DNA to trace the evolutionary split between head and body lice, researchers conclude that body lice first came on the scene approximately 190,000 years ago. And that shift, the scientists propose, followed soon after people first began wearing clothing.
from the comments
‘Vaginal-Rectum Area’ is the name of my Megadeth cover band.
spam name
Delmar Wang.
I’m also one of the people in Georgia who has a microchip
The Georgia legislature is working on a bill that would “prohibit requiring a person to be implanted with a microchip.” You know, to protect people from something that isn’t in the recently passed health care bill. During hearings, though, new shit came to light.
“Microchips are like little beepers,” the woman told the committee. “Just imagine, if you will, having a beeper in your rectum or genital area, the most sensitive area of your body. And your beeper number’s displayed on billboards throughout the city. All done without your permission.”
“Ma’am, did you say you have a microchip?” state Rep. Tom Weldon (R) asked the woman.
“Yes, I do. This microchip was put in my vaginal-rectum area,” she replied.
No one laughed. State Rep. Wendell Willard (R), chairman of the House Judiciary Committee, asked her who had implanted the chip.
“The Department of Defense,” she said.
Willard thanked the woman for her input, and the committee later approved the bill.
Poets — ranked by beard weight
Have you seen this hilarity?
Samuel Morse (1791 – 1872)
Beard type: Garibaldi Elongated
Typical opus: What Hath God Wrought
Gravity (UPI rating): 58
I’m nearly a year late in discovery but, as you know, I just love talking about beards.
4/20
Today is pot smoking day.
The Future of Sewing Machines
It dyes white thread to match the color of the cloth you are working with.
Frightened Rabbit – Swim Until You Can’t See Land
dear clusterflock
Can you pronounce the name of the Icelandic volcano?
Repairing a Picasso
Remember how The Actor was damaged? Well, they’ve repaired it now.
Restoration involved a slow and careful realignment of the painting, and that meant time. So for six weeks “The Actor” lay face down, with varying weights on it to counteract the “memory” of the damage. First, Ms. Belloli said, she placed small silk sand bags that she made herself on the affected area; then slightly heavier ones, the kind seamstresses use to hold a pattern in place; and gradually heavier and heavier weights, stopping at one pound. Once the canvas seemed stabilized, she placed a clear Mylar patch on the back. “We didn’t want to hide any part of the other painting,” Ms. Belloli said.
quote out of context
By placing an order via this Web site on the first day of the fourth month of the year 2010 Anno Domini, you agree to grant Us a non transferable option to claim, for now and for ever more, your immortal soul.
(via marginal revolution)
something I learned from last week
People don’t read web sites when they are doing their taxes.
Omnaris! To the Nose!
What’s up with allergy and foot fungus commercials all being animated CGI?
I tried to find the animated John Madden Tinactin commercials, but no luck. Also, I tried to find that weird 2D one for I think asthma where the woman is a completely blacked-out illustration against a landscape of color, but I couldn’t remember the name of the drug. That one freeps me out.
someone else’s comments
I’m sure this is the same diet Jesus would have enjoyed.
From the comments of an article about the health benefits of olive oil.
from the spam
asymmetric bob
spam name
Helene Yaya.
