from The Anthologist by Nicholson Baker, via Frank Chimero
posted by Luke Neff in advice, quotes | * | 7 comments
This is one of my favorite things ever.
The hamburger day-seizers, they’re assholes. I know them. I’m related to at least a couple of them. They have no appreciation for what they haven’t wrought or forced.
This afternoon I am plucking, not seizing, yarrow, whose stalks I intend to use for I Ching divination.
I don’t know what else to say other than that I love this.
Well, if y’all haven’t read Nicholson Baker’s novels, it’s time to get started. The man is brilliant and hilarious. He’s had a longstanding love/hate relationship with librarians that is also amusing. His book, The Mezzanine is a work of art. The Fermata is one of the funniest books I have ever read. It includes a scene in which a librarian equips the seat of a riding lawnmower with a dildo and commences to mow a lot of grass. Vox is one long, relentless phone sex experience. He also has a story about potatoes that sprout tendrils and creep into sleeping people’s orifices. He says that was inspired by librarians, too. I can believe it.
I think I’m going to have vegetable nightmares now.
@Cindy Every time someone mentions a fermata I can’t help but think of that cheesy saying “Hold me, I’m a fermata”