April 19, 2011
dear clusterflock
What’s your favorite brand and style of underwear?
My favorite are the unfortunately named Cocksox’s boxer briefs. They are made of a synthetic, wicking, quick-dry material called (get this) ‘Supplex®.’ If you’re a cyclist, you probably want these. Oh, and their website is hilarious(ly bad).
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Commando.
not while cycling.
Spanx then.
have you looked at the website yet? you should look at the website.
Porn.
yeeeaah.
did you see jorge’s comment? you should look at jorge’s comment.
I just see a comment from Josh?
I pretty much wear what the proprietor of the Sally Ann Corset Shop suggests I wear.
jorge’s comment is precisely why I hate people.
Sign him up for clusterflock.
Sheila, what about Mr. Bra?
I’ll go commando before I go to Mr. Bra.
Oh, and Andrew, I first read his name as “Jorge California.”
Andrew, how were you ever convinced to wear something with such a horrible name?
My father swore up and down about them and then bought me a few pair for Christmas. Now I wouldn’t ride a bike without them, to be honest. Chafing is super minimal.
The real question is what ever convinced my father to wear something with such a horrible name.
Welcome to the Jorge California.
Thank you.
When you wear Lycra with chamois, you don’t need no stinking boxer briefs. Chafing is non-existent.
were I racing, I’d wear Lycra. Otherwise, forget about it.
I’m somewhere between racing and riding around town. I can’t imagine a long ride without my kit.
We will see how things change in Kansas City, but in Saint Louis, the longest I would ride was 35 miles in a day and that was very uncommon. Mostly, it stick around 3-10 depending on what sort of work I had. Remember, I’ve been working from home.
I rode 30 miles on Saturday. In a circle. But during the week, it’s 8 miles in to work and 8 miles home.
that’s probably a good average of my riding during the summer. most of my friends moved down to the south of saint louis which meant 6-8 miles there and back in the evenings.
I wish that most of my employment did not require a 350-mile RT commute.
I’m working on it.
It was nice those few years when a big ol’ far-flung law firm paid my travel expenses. Not so nice now that my travel is merely the “cost of doing business.”
Those people who raised their eyebrows when I left a tenured job and merrily declared that I’d “live by my wits”? I bet they’d laugh and nod knowingly if they knew. So let’s just keep this our little secret, okay?
I like that their FAQ is titled “WTF.”
My question is, when you’re sorting and folding your newly laundered drawers, do you split them into piles by category? If so, what are the categories?
My groupings are something like
* Dateworthy
* Everyday
* Dorky but otherwise unobjectionable
* Don’t get hit by a bus in these
I have one category: comfortable.
The categorizing might be a girl thing. Or it might just be me.
I have just one category: will I be somewhere that I might have to get up and pee outside the room I’m sleeping in.
I am not sure it is, I just know I’m an exceedingly practical man about these things.
Are all your Cocksox the same color? If so, what color? If not, do you have a favorite color among them? Do you save the pair(s) in that color for special days, or do you just enjoy them whenever their turn comes around?
I had a boyfriend one of whose best qualities was that he was really easy to get presents for: eccentric taste, and he needed just about everything. Needing Everything is probably not the best quality for a boyfriend to have, generally, but it was handy around Christmas and his birthday; I still sometimes send him presents, because I run across things that are just so perfectly him. His current girlfriend may be unokay with this, but if so, he’s never mentioned it.
One of the things I used to be on the lookout for all the time but that I do not bestow upon him any longer, girlfriendly indifference or no, was boxer shorts with attractive prints. Whimsical but not comedic was the goal. One of my most successful selections was, as I recall, pale blue shorts with half-dollar-sized ladybugs on them. He loved those shorts, but I don’t recall his saving them for special days. A special day was probably whenever he’d just done laundry and could wear all his favorite things again.
I’m not like that.
White, blue, and black are the colors. I find myself being most drawn to blue, if only because I mostly wear jeans these days and the idea of matching underwear feels right.
I also used to be the guy who needed everything, but then one day I decided that I wasn’t going to skimp on nice underwear (or whatever) because I was okay about encroaching on my booze budget. It was one of my better moments in life.
Apropos of all that, I just received the following from one of my most treasured correspondents:
Okay, godammit, I have to say, not that they’re favorites, just functional, I bought them when I needed new shorts. I’ve worn “Old Navy” boxers for twenty years. Some of them are almost that old. I have, for patterns, pineapples, bananas (Is that a banana, or are you just glad to see me?), plaids, etc. I, too, am practical, they aren’t quite worn out, yet.
Some I’d be embarrassed about, were I to be stripped clean in an ambulance. Sometimes I think about that when I’m putting them on.
The way I see it, if the EMTs are concerned about my underpants, I’m fucked.
I just now wheezy laughed. So true.
I think the ladybug ones came from Old Navy.
I despise that brand, because their clothes are so shittily made, but they do have some fabulous pattern designers.
India, I’ve discovered, over the course of years, they’ve made boxers out of left-over shirt fabrics. And yes, shittily. The “larges” are different, garment to garment. Still, they are what I’ve covered my ass with, for the last twenty years.
For all my years at Saks, I know there is quality. I just had to weigh the decision what to spend money on.
To quote my friend Stephen, “I learned just enough in college to make me miserable for the rest of my life.”
That quote called a lot more than underwear to me.