April 25, 2011

Law librarian out of context

From the law librarian’s life-life rather than her work life:

Daddy [pointing to the border collie which he has lost faith in]:  “Tha’ dumbass ain’t got no more sense than a turnip. He ain’t no more a registered border collie than I am.”

Librarian: “Whad’ee do this time?”

Daddy: “Aaawww, ‘ee went down the road t’ Joyce’s house, where them new renters is livin and got t’fightin eez dog. An tha fool tried t’ pull em apart an got eez arm ripped up.” [look of contempt] “I mean, goddamn. Yer a grown ass man. An’ you doan know not to git between two dawgs? Shit.”

Librarian: “So then wha happened?”

Daddy: “Well, tha stupid sumbitch kep callin me an callin me can leavin messages on m’phone whinin bout rabies. So I got sicka tha shit an I drove over there.”

Librarian: “Yeah.”

Daddy: “An win I got over there ‘ee said ‘I’m sorry we have to be introduced in this situation.’  I said, ‘I ain’t got no situation.  I tole ya over the phone tha eez gotta rabies shot. So I kin either leave ‘eem ‘ere fer you t’see if ‘ee develops rabies, er I kin put im in the truck an drive home.”

Librarian: “So thin what happened?”

Daddy: “I grabbed im an wint home.”

Librarian: “Did tha guy keep callin ya? What happened t’ him?”

Daddy: “I doan know. Eee coulda died a rabies fer all the fuck I know. I jus wanted to make sure tha he knew tha I was not concerned about it.”

posted by in no shit, pets, randy taylor, texas, war, yep | * | 6 comments 

comments

  1. Tycho on April 25th, 2011 at 10:05 pm

    I love the drawl here. Pitch-perfect. It reminds me of The Grapes of Wrath.

  2. Deron Bauman on April 26th, 2011 at 1:44 am

    That’s all kinds of good.

  3. Cindy Scroggins on April 26th, 2011 at 1:55 am

    Yep. I thought you’d like it!

  4. Dave Vogt on April 26th, 2011 at 5:42 am

    It’s important, when likely not dying of rabies, not to trouble people about it who wouldn’t be concerned if you were.

  5. Cindy Scroggins on April 26th, 2011 at 6:46 am

    Yes, Dave. I have long held to that same belief.

  6. Sheila Ryan on April 26th, 2011 at 9:43 am

    No more a registered border collie than I am.