“We have a society that’s really built upon self-sufficiency and independence and yet it’s not sustainable,” she said. “You need someone with your complementary skills to get through it.”
Cindy’s Easter Art from Pinky Diablo
Tweet of the Day
A Lonely Hunter
This human heart has had the fat and extra tissue removed, leaving pure angel-hair blood vessels to make up its shape.
Via this wonderful collection of curiosities. The internet is a wonderful thing, yes? Yes.
Up With Jesus
“Pastor Jack, do we have a ladder that will reach the ceiling in the sanctuary? That Jason boy let go his balloon in there and it’s up at the peak over the pulpit.”
“What?”
“Do we have a ladder that will reach the ceiling in the sanctuary? That Jason boy let go his balloon in there and it’s up at the peak over the pulpit.”
“Balloon?”
“Yessir. One of those metal ones shape like a fat rocket.
“What color?”
“Well. Shiney.”
“Did you check with Dale?”
“About what?”
“About the ladder. He’s the one uses one to clean the windows.”
* * *
Pastor Jack looks up from his sermon book when Steve sticks his head in.
“Pastor Jack the ladders are locked up and Dale’s got the keys and he’s gone.”
“Well, we can’t have a balloon up there during Easter service.”
Steve prays for a moment, then looks up. “What about that pellet rifle you use for the squirrels?”
“In the sanctuary?”
“I bet two pumps’ll pop it and not hurt the varnish.”
* * *
“Good shot,” Steve says slowly as the punctured balloon motors around high above the pulpit. Exhausted, finally, it falls and hangs up on the crucifix, snagged by the crown of thorns.
“That’s not going to work,” Pastor Jack says. “Reckon we could twist some coat hangers together and get it?”
“No time for that. Service starts in a few minutes.”
The two men ponder the hooded Jesus.
Pastor Jack looks at Steve. “How tall are you and how much do you weigh?”
“I’m 6-2 and one thirty-five.”
“All right, get that chair over there so you can get up and stand on my shoulders.”
Steve blinks a few times and his adam’s apple moves up and down, but he fetches the chair.
“That’s it,” Pastor Jack says through gritted teeth as Steve gets his left foot up on a shoulder. He steadies himself by holding onto Jesus’s feet and stands. He’s reaching up when he hears Pastor Jack start to make a noise like a screen door opening.
And suddenly Pastor Jack is down and still, eyes staring, one hand clutching the black slacks he has pulled from Steve’s legs on the way down. “Pastor Jack?” Steve calls, clinging to the Redeemer’s knees. “Pastor Jack!”
* * *
Deacon Wayne runs through the gathered crowd to the double doors of the sanctuary and unlocks them. The congregation surges in. They all get situated on their pews and gaze up at the show—Pastor Jack sprawled in his camouflage windbreaker beside the pulpit and Brother Steve, pantless, praying into Jesus’s thighs. Mrs. Nash, in a front pew, fusses with her pearls and whispers to her husband. “I don’t see this in the program.” His nodding stops for a moment and then resumes. She leans in again. “This is a literal mystery.”
Sexy Sax Man
tweet of the day
from the comments
I think we need a “camel-toe” category.
Shroud of Turin replica coming to Galena
During Holy Week, St. Matthew Lutheran Church will present a full-size replica of the Shroud of Turin, accurate to the smallest detail. Measuring 14.5 feet by four feet, and printed on fabric from the most accurate color photographs of the Shroud ever taken.
Dads: The Original Hipsters
Hands Off (Royal Wedding Song) – Scottish Falsetto Sock Puppet Theatre
self-sufficiency
I haven’t had her particular experience, but what the lady says is true:
tweet of the day
Remembering Scott, 4
From my friend, M.
In the spring of 1974 I’m in our side yard outside the guest house talking to my dad, waiting for Scott who’s coming to pick me up. We hear a huge crash at our corner. The next thing I know I hear my dad yelling, “Lay down Scott. Lay down, son.” Not watching the traffic (the one other car on the street), Scott had crossed in front of an oncoming pick-up truck. Scott’s head goes through the windshield (remember the scars on his forehead?), and it’s like the car explodes. His car was spun around and jammed against the curb, glass sparkling on the ground, and the hatch back was open and stuff was scattered across Mrs. Cantey’s front yard. Scott crawls out of the car, bleeding profusely from lacerations to his head. The woman who was driving the pick-up truck was crying and saying “he just turned right in front of me, he didn’t look, oh my god.” There was a long Loretta Lynn style wig laying in the gutter and someone asked if it was a dog he’d swerved to avoid. Scott’s still lying in Mrs. Cantey’s yard, my dad’s with him telling him he’ll be ok, while I call an ambulance and his mother. I go back to the street and by now the whole neighborhood is standing around looking, and now I’m looking too. Bras, fake jelly boobs, gigantic high heels, a sequined top, wigs and other hair pieces and all sorts of drag paraphernalia are lying all over the place. By now the police are there and the ambulance. The police officer asks me if I can get Scott’s driver’s license. So I reach in Scott’s front pocket where he carried his license, 3 dollars, and a small bottle of poppers. I went with Scott in the ambulance. My dad stayed and managed the business of the tow truck, and I suppose he gathered the wigs, shoes, makeup and fake boobs and put them back in Scott’s destroyed purple Gremlin hatchback. My dad never mentioned a word about the stuff.
photo out of context
Culver’s (For Joel)
Welcome to delicious.
I think I may just have found a new hobby
on Apple’s possible cloud-based music service
All Things D points out that having official licenses can allow Apple to store a single master copy of a song rather than storing individual copies for every user. Amazon’s original argument against needing the licenses was that their service was the same as any upload storage service. This meant that users needed to upload copies of their old music to be able to stream them. With the proper deals, Apple could avoid the need to upload individual copies and simply allow users to stream off of the single master copy. This could save on significant upload time for the user and storage requirements for Apple.
Asta Nielsen’s Hamlet
I stumbled on this yesterday. A 1920s-era, trans-gender, silent film adaptation of Hamlet, staring Asta Nielsen.
Scenes from the 1920 silent film adaptation of William Shakespeare’s “Hamlet” starring Danish silent film actress Asta Nielsen. In this interpretation, inspired by Dr. Edward P. Vining’s book The Mystery of Hamlet, Hamlet is born female and disguised as a male to preserve the lineage. Though a radical interpretation, the New York Times said this film, “holds a secure place in class with the best.”
You can watch the entire film here. I told Sheila I was proud to have found something she didn’t already know about.
Manmachine Plays Jazz
From beatmania gottamix
Recently Watched
Zach Galifianakis – Live at the Purple Onion
This might be stand up for people who don’t really like stand up. It mixes road trip footage, interviews with Galifianakis’s fake brother Seth, and live performance. Reading some of the negative reviews will give you an idea of why I liked it so much. It is streaming on Amazon Prime and Netflix, or you can buy it here.
Exit Through the Gift Shop
Errol Morris recommended this as the best movie of the year. You can watch it on Netflix or Amazon Prime or buy it here.
Chicks With Steve Buscemeyes
Audry Hepburn with Steve Buscemeyes.
Product Description
Get that classic 19th century look with our Gentlemen’s Moustache, a costume facial hair accessory. This costume facial hair is available in a variety of colors including black, blonde, light grey, dark grey, light brown and medium brown. Our Gentleman’s Moustache costume facial hair is made of 100% human hair on a lace back for a realistic look. Spirit gum is needed to apply this item. This human hair moustache facial hair would make a great accessory to a Englishman, Colonel Major or other 19th century character costume. One size fits most adults.
I asked them for their scripts
Terence Stamp in “Toby Dammit”
Terence Stamp, speaking in his own voice, in “Toby Dammit,” Federico Fellini’s contribution to the 1968 omnibus (anthology) film, Histoires extraordinaires (Extraordinary Stories/Spirits of the Dead).
For years only dubbed versions were easily available.
This is my Easter basket treat for all y’all. Make of it what you will.
(Terence Stamp just got another award. This one from the Film Society. San Francisco.)
The Last Supper — Monty Python LIVE!
(Thanks to Ju Ju.)
