is what people say to me when I tell them just how much I honestly hate most people. For those who have stood before me confused by such statements, I present to you a wonderful illustration of why.
posted by Andrew Simone in not satire, observations, this is why we can't have nice things, urban legends | * | 10 comments
Tim’s comment on this is perfect.
Like, how would you ever get past the web-net of language you constructed in order to show-hide yourself enough to intimidate-trick someone into a date. Not you. The people in the advertisements.
Wow, and here I was thinking that my Meet the Flockers introduction was cringe-making.
This is great fun to read, although it’s sort of like looking at wrecks along the highway. Inventing these things is actually a great way for a writer to invent characters. “Lonely guy seeks goat. Must be piebald and Duchampish.”
This seems a good place to say I’ve been singing “Tyrone” ever since yesterday afternoon. Y’all should hear me. I’m singing it right now in my office.
I’m gettin tired of yo shit
You don’t never buy me nothin
I’m naming my next cat “Tyrone” and changing my name to Erica Bidet.
That sounds sensible.
As sensible as some Easy Spirit pumps.
I’m sorry I super love the n+1 personals.
I think I must have been in a contrary mood these past few weeks but I love dancing girls and fat baby and I love these and I love ever-thang!
Oh Cindy. Submit that to n+1.
I submit to no one.
I pay your way
And your homeboy’s way
And sometimes your cousin’s way!
Uh, you bedda call Ty-rone
And tell him come on
And help you
Git Yo Shit
I sing my own backup.