February 25, 2012

quotes out of context

The Euthanasia Coaster is designed to thrill the hell out of its passengers just before it kills them.

Maybe she’s from Peru. I don’t care.

The art of the leak requires information to be packaged just right, she notes.

“We are told it is very quick to learn and once the user is adept at navigation, it becomes second nature and almost indistinguishable to outside users.”

“Inconceivable!”

posted by in categories, quotes | * | 11 comments 

comments

  1. Michael Smith on February 25th, 2012 at 1:35 pm

    although Google expects some of the nerdiest users will wear them a lot

    Who, apart from ” the nerdiest”, do they expect to buy these things?

  2. Deron Bauman on February 25th, 2012 at 1:44 pm

    I love the idea of them, but I can’t imagine wearing them…. Can I?

  3. Michael Smith on February 25th, 2012 at 1:46 pm

    Inconceivable.

  4. Deron Bauman on February 25th, 2012 at 1:48 pm

    Well done.

  5. Deron Bauman on February 25th, 2012 at 1:50 pm

    For the record, once this stuff goes transdermal, or transcranial, I’m definitely onboard.

  6. Dave Vogt on February 25th, 2012 at 7:37 pm

    What about a ballcap with a camera on the front and a tiny projector on the bill aimed at your eye?

  7. Deron Bauman on February 25th, 2012 at 7:42 pm

    Or, something like this.

  8. MontanaJen on February 25th, 2012 at 8:16 pm

    “Fuck you 500,000 times. Please very aggressively lick the folds of my aging scrotum. Twitter is free and I reserve the right to have my next 800 posts be the same carrot cake recipe that your mom enjoyed after I fucked her, while your dad watched and coached me on what she likes.”

    I love this so hard I want to commit it to memory to use it against someone who offends my sensibility so far as to necessitate a verbal slap such as this.

    So many beautiful and visual insults revolve around the invitation to orally service male genitalia in general. In addition, the ‘yo mama’ style insult expanded – as seen above. (May I say that our hero was particularly creative with the added ‘yo daddy watched’ angle. Nicely done, sir.)

    I’d try to switch it around to reflect the female gender, but somehow that would just make it too anatomically…I don’t know…explicit.

  9. Dave Vogt on February 25th, 2012 at 10:06 pm

    Oh no not at all Jen, I think that’s the beauty of it. You can’t get too visceral or too explicit, so long as you keep it succinct.

  10. Michael Smith on February 26th, 2012 at 12:27 am

    I’ve just decided that BeltNutz TM is going to include a smartphone device that can be projected onto walls and controlled with (subtle) hip thrusts.

  11. Deron Bauman on February 26th, 2012 at 12:33 am

    Thank you, Michael. You’re doing the Lord’s work.

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