comments

1. Sheila Ryan on March 2nd, 2012 at 1:56 pm

   I’m confused as to whether I am a slut or a slattern.

2. Deron Bauman on March 2nd, 2012 at 2:04 pm

   Ask Rush Limbaugh.

3. Sheila Ryan on March 2nd, 2012 at 2:05 pm

   I’d rather ask Joad Cressbeckler.

4. Deron Bauman on March 2nd, 2012 at 2:08 pm

   You think we could start a media campaign to get Limbaugh replaced with Cressbeckler?

5. Sheila Ryan on March 2nd, 2012 at 2:16 pm

   Depends on whether ornery sells.

6. Michael Smith on March 2nd, 2012 at 2:16 pm

   At a family gathering that included my family and another family my conservative grandmother was speaking to other conservative grandparents. I actively tried not to listen as just the smell of the ignorance around the table they sat at was making me sick (I’m pretty sure the grandfather said, “they’re breeding like rabbits and pretty soon they’ll out number us,” “them” I assumed “they” meant Mexican-Americans but the response was, “I think he is a Muslim,” so maybe Muslims?). At one point they talked about ol’ Rush who apparently lost his radio slot in the East Bay, I’m not really sure, I can’t keep tabs on every lunatic in the media. Anyway, Sheila, I think the grandparents would probably say you’re both and whisper about your desire to ruin this country.

7. Carole Corlew on March 2nd, 2012 at 2:35 pm

   Shelia, I would like to nominate the term “strumpet,” which makes me laugh to say out loud.

8. Sheila Ryan on March 2nd, 2012 at 2:41 pm

   Also, Deron? I think maybe Cressbeckler likes the ladies (and sometimes the fellers) too much to label anyone a slut.

9. Sheila Ryan on March 2nd, 2012 at 2:42 pm

   You’d think people who were concerned about other people breeding like rabbits would be in favor of widespread access to contraception.

10. Sheila Ryan on March 2nd, 2012 at 2:45 pm

    Carole, I would burst out laughing if any commentator bellowed that someone was a strumpet.

    Harlot. Floozy. Tart. Minx. Trollop.

11. Michael Smith on March 2nd, 2012 at 3:09 pm

    Sheila, linking contraception to breeding like rabbits would require a lot of logical thinking. I’m not sure that’s where their strengths lie.

    Other things they discussed:

    The President’s refusal to go to prayer meetings and willingness to visit a Mosque and, while there, remove his shoes!

    How you won’t be able to buy incandescent bulbs anywhere pretty soon.

    Psalms.

12. Deron Bauman on March 2nd, 2012 at 3:10 pm

    All language is a code.

13. Deron Bauman on March 2nd, 2012 at 3:11 pm

    That points to nothing but our wounds.

14. Sheila Ryan on March 2nd, 2012 at 3:46 pm

    Yes, “breeding like rabbits” does connote much much more than the simple production of numerous progeny.

15. Deron Bauman on March 2nd, 2012 at 3:47 pm

    Two words. Rabbit condoms.

16. Michael Grant Smith on March 2nd, 2012 at 4:13 pm

    It’s funny to hear a whore call someone a slut.

17. Sheila Ryan on March 2nd, 2012 at 4:17 pm

    MGS nails it.

18. Kathy Hilen-Smith on March 2nd, 2012 at 4:20 pm

    I like to have sex more than I like to have babies. I also like rabbits, but don’t have any.

19. Sheila Ryan on March 2nd, 2012 at 4:27 pm

    Kathy, you are a treasure. You slut.

20. Deron Bauman on March 2nd, 2012 at 4:29 pm

    I guess I’m a slut.

21. Rick Neece on March 2nd, 2012 at 4:36 pm

    Once at the bar (before I met Danny, of course), I happened to strike up a conversation with a guy who said, sotto voce into my ear, as he lightly touched my hand, I can be a slut sometimes.

    I invited him over for coffee. When we got to my place, I said, Cream? Sugar? He said he didn’t drink coffee. He opened my button-fly 501′s with his teeth.

22. Deron Bauman on March 2nd, 2012 at 4:36 pm

    Cheers!

23. Rick Neece on March 2nd, 2012 at 4:44 pm

    I wrote that before I saw Deron’s comment. Timing is code, too. There’s nothing more to see here, it’s unrelated, move along.

24. Sheila Ryan on March 2nd, 2012 at 4:48 pm

    “I don’t drink coffee.” Code: Slut.

25. Deron Bauman on March 2nd, 2012 at 4:49 pm

    Wait, I’m not a slut anymore?

26. Kathy Hilen-Smith on March 2nd, 2012 at 4:51 pm

    I’m just saying, considering the options —sex, babies, rabbits, what have you— is not unlike an ample selection of hors d’ oeuvres at a lovely cocktail party. Sample what you like, but if one is more appealing than the other, go back for more. Sex is like a coconut shrimp: more is better. Babies? They can repeat on you. Rabbit is not bad grilled and skewered with a nice peanut dipping sauce on the side.

27. Sheila Ryan on March 2nd, 2012 at 4:55 pm

    Oh, no, Deron. Sure, you’re a slut. “I don’t drink coffee” is merely one of many slut codes.

28. Deron Bauman on March 2nd, 2012 at 4:56 pm

    THANK YOU!

29. Deron Bauman on March 2nd, 2012 at 4:57 pm

    Dipping sauce.

30. Sheila Ryan on March 2nd, 2012 at 4:58 pm

    I always go back for more of what I like. Coconut shrimp is good. So’s rock shrimp and grits. Not so easy as an hors d’ oeuvre, but I had some at a reception at the Getty Museum in LA one night, and I went back for more.

    I had a really good rabbit stew at this one bistro in Paris a long time ago.

31. Sheila Ryan on March 2nd, 2012 at 4:59 pm

    DERON! YESSSSS!!!!!

32. Deron Bauman on March 2nd, 2012 at 5:01 pm

    Perhaps only slightly related. I’m still reeling from that sweaty meringue you and Amy ate and called dessert.

33. Rick Neece on March 2nd, 2012 at 5:05 pm

    KHS: “Babies? They can repeat on you.”

    I’m laughing so hard I can hardly type.

34. Rick Neece on March 2nd, 2012 at 5:06 pm

    “Sweaty meringue.”

    Oh, god, stop! You’re killing me.

35. Deron Bauman on March 2nd, 2012 at 5:08 pm

    I’ll say.

36. Sheila Ryan on March 2nd, 2012 at 5:08 pm

    Deron, that sweaty meringue . . . well, remember that we ate only a little bit, then set it aside to play with. For you to pour salt on, hoping it would shrivel up like a snail. For me to squirt lemon on.

    Amy and I did demolish the coconut cream part of that coconut cream pie, though. That was pretty good.

    We ordered it, you know, because, as Amy said to me, “Deron won’t eat it.”

    Maybe it’s a girl thing.

37. Deron Bauman on March 2nd, 2012 at 5:09 pm

    My eyes!

38. Sheila Ryan on March 2nd, 2012 at 5:10 pm

    Quoting Rick quoting KHS: “Babies? They can repeat on you.”

    Reminds me of when Phil posted about bending down to kiss his infant son and his son (“Bless him,” said Phil) vomiting into Phil’s mouth.

39. Deron Bauman on March 2nd, 2012 at 5:11 pm

    Sweaty meringue.

40. Rick Neece on March 2nd, 2012 at 5:12 pm

    Danny’s favorite dessert our friend Crash made. Coconut Cream pie. Crash forgot to add the coconut.

41. Sheila Ryan on March 2nd, 2012 at 5:13 pm

    People, there was this slab of coconut cream pie that Amy and I shared. And the meringue was three inches high. We ate a tiny bit, then scraped it off for Deron to mess with. Okay, for us to mess with, too.

    Not a one of us ordered any coffee.

42. Sheila Ryan on March 2nd, 2012 at 5:14 pm

    Sweaty meringue pie. “Sir, would you like that with or without coconut?”

43. Sheila Ryan on March 2nd, 2012 at 5:15 pm

    Slutty meringue pie.

44. Rick Neece on March 2nd, 2012 at 5:16 pm

    I’m going to die here in the garage. Expelling my last gasps of breath laughing.

    When the time comes, I hope that’s how I finally go.

45. Deron Bauman on March 2nd, 2012 at 5:16 pm

    I’d eat a coconutless cream pie. I’d eat the shit out of it. I’d eat a coconut cream pie too, just not my favorite. And meringue? Meringue can go fuck itself sweaty.

46. Sheila Ryan on March 2nd, 2012 at 5:17 pm

    Plain cream pie. Cream pie. Slutty cream pie.

    I want the American people to pay for my slutty cream pie.

47. Deron Bauman on March 2nd, 2012 at 5:18 pm

    Video.

48. Sheila Ryan on March 2nd, 2012 at 5:20 pm

    If flockers will pay for my slutty cream pie, I will post a video.

49. Sheila Ryan on March 2nd, 2012 at 5:22 pm

    Rick, you still there in the garage? When the time comes for me, I hope it’s all slutty cream pie.

50. Deron Bauman on March 2nd, 2012 at 5:22 pm

    Slutty cream pie, all the way down.

51. Sheila Ryan on March 2nd, 2012 at 5:23 pm

    Deron said “all the way down.”

52. Sheila Ryan on March 2nd, 2012 at 5:23 pm

    Joad Cressbeckler’s Ornery Cream Pie.

53. Deron Bauman on March 2nd, 2012 at 5:26 pm

    We’re gonna stick it to a few whores sos’n we don’t lose our minds.

54. Kathy Hilen-Smith on March 2nd, 2012 at 5:26 pm

    See? Now if getting a lot of what you like needs a label, I’m okay with “slut”: coffee slut, meringue slut, button fly 501 slut, coconut shrimp slut, Getty Museum slut (damn, Sheila).

    Rush L can go fuck himself.

55. Sheila Ryan on March 2nd, 2012 at 5:26 pm

    Sluts.

56. Sheila Ryan on March 2nd, 2012 at 5:27 pm

    Scenes of this type have become common in gay and straight pornography since the turn of the 21st century.

57. Sheila Ryan on March 2nd, 2012 at 5:28 pm

    Button fly 501 slut.

58. Deron Bauman on March 2nd, 2012 at 5:33 pm

    Rush Limbaugh sweaty meringue creampie.

59. Deron Bauman on March 2nd, 2012 at 5:35 pm

    I’m glad we’ve had this talk.

60. Rick Neece on March 2nd, 2012 at 5:36 pm

    I’m still in the garage, for a little while longer, Sheila. Don’t call 911. I’ve caught my breath. Had a cigarette. This is the funniest thread on C’flock for a while.

    IMHO.

61. Kathy Hilen-Smith on March 2nd, 2012 at 5:45 pm

    Good God, Sheila! I had no idea Wiki could be that informative. The only thing missing was solid Rick Santorum joke.

62. Rick Neece on March 2nd, 2012 at 5:59 pm

    Sheila? Was it Michael Smith brought a good one? My efforts to find it failed. I didn’t want to leave KHS holding the bag.

63. Deron Bauman on March 2nd, 2012 at 6:03 pm

    This one?

64. Kathy Hilen-Smith on March 2nd, 2012 at 6:12 pm

    That’s the stuff! That Santorum is a laugh riot!

65. Deron Bauman on March 2nd, 2012 at 6:23 pm

    Also.

66. Kathy Hilen-Smith on March 2nd, 2012 at 6:33 pm

    Alabama three way.

67. Deron Bauman on March 2nd, 2012 at 6:41 pm

    Ah-ee!

68. Frank Patrick on March 2nd, 2012 at 8:27 pm

    Jane, you ignorant…

69. Erica Braverman on March 2nd, 2012 at 8:44 pm

    I prefer the term trollope. With meringue on the side.