6 thoughts on “dear clusterflock

  1. Robert Ledgerwood

    When I was in high school, I was diagnosed as bi-polar. I got put on some meds and they worked pretty well. The problem was that “working well” meant leveling me out. I missed the highs and I decided the lows were worth the cost. I stopped taking my medication and over the last 15 years or so have gotten to a point where I know when I’m going into a “low”. I know I can’t really do anything creative or be sociable when I’m there, so I just enjoy the simple things in life while it runs it’s course. I watch movies, I read books. I laugh at cats on the internet.

    I don’t see the lows as a horrible thing anymore. It gives me time to meditate and collect my thoughts. But when the highs kick in, it’s the best thing ever. Sometimes things fall into place, sometimes they miss their mark every time. You just have to go with it.

    To quote Rilo Kiley;

    And sometimes when you’re on you’re really fucking on
    And your friends they sing along and they love you
    But the lows are so extreme that the good seems fucking cheap
    And it teases you for weeks in its absence

  2. Robert Ledgerwood

    I’d like to add that I don’t necessarily recommend quitting meds for everyone. It’s not an easy thing to do, and I don’t look down on anyone who does need medication to function. Life’s some serious shit.

Comments are closed.