Just stop running
If you’re familiar with this song you don’t have to listen to it, unless you just want to. I have a question that pertains to it. Go ahead and listen if you don’t know it, I’ll wait.
Quote with only the barest context (For Danny)
I’ve seen your D come out sometimes, but you’re not a D.
while discussing the DISC behavioral assessment
Dear Clusterflock
Have you ever been fired from a job? Have you ever (as the wording on applications goes now) left a position after finding out that you would be terminated? What about quitting in a heated way?
The only way I have ever left a job is with plenty of notice, voluntarily and on good terms. Am I missing something?
Dear Ladies of Clusterflock
Why are there three D-cup sizes, but only one of each of the rest? Am I somehow confused? Is there a mysterious double-B cup that I’ve never seen?
A Treatise on Irony
Or maybe it’s about arguing on the internet. I’m not entirely sure.
UPDATE: For Cindy
Today at work
Today at work I met a post-op male-to-female transsexual. This makes the first post-op that I’ve ever met. She’s a good boy.
It is now time to insert the birth control device
I was looking for a Michael Smith song called “The Wonderful World of Sex,” but I found this instead.
Quote out of context
“What motivated him to throw a puppy at the Hell’s Angels is currently unclear,” said a spokesman for local police, adding that the student had lately been suffering from depression.
We’ve already heard that one
(via @BPGlobalPR)
Facial expressions that I cannot represent with emoticons
Please let me know if you know a good ascii representation of any of the following:
- a sheepish grin
- an encouraging “it’ll be ok” smile
- laughing after crying hysterically
- naive determination
- indignation
- that particular forced smile made by a father when his daughter announces her engagement to the exact kind of man he hoped she wouldn’t
Bacon socks?
These are designed for and marketed to men.
Dear Clusterflock
Do sexual harassment protections extend to workers in the world’s oldest profession?
First Day of Work
Just to make sure everyone is covered, I’ll let you know here. I missed my 2:30 flight to Houston and therefore the last flight from Houston to anywhere in the DC Metro. They were able to put me on the last flight to Houston instead (at no charge) and the first flight to Dulles in the morning. I made it home with no trouble.
My first day of work went well. It was something of an after-the-holiday type of day, but I learned how to keep busy.
Dry Ice (Kelsey?)
So suddenly I decide I really like the idea of dry ice in my beverages. Is there a local grocer or dispensary in Silverthorne that carries it?
Posted at work on my ipoop, borrowing my employers’ wifi. Categories please Deron?
Dear Clusterflock
Whatcha thinkin’ about?
Dear Clusterflock
I think it’s time for some REVEALING PERSONAL TRUTHS ABOUT OURSELVES!
Census Statistics
Here’s an interesting statistic that you won’t hear when the Census Bureau releases the data for the 2010 Census: Roughly half of people who didn’t mail in their census form are assholes.
Ignore Stephen Baldwin
What Amy Said
Have your allergies been bothering you? Tree pollen is really high right now, I read on the radio.
The 2010 Decennial Census
I wish that sharing information regarding my work as a census enumerator didn’t carry a penalty of fines not to exceed $250,000 or a period of time in prison with a limit which I don’t recall, or both. People are strange, mysterious creatures. If you ever get a chance to be a census worker, to walk around and knock on your neighbors’ doors and ask them personal questions on the government’s dime, I say do it.
In looking through the list of categories, there are surprisingly few that wouldn’t apply to at least one of my visits (and it’s only day one.)
I found you another pictures-story
This one is about a bookseller who has every book in the world. Almost.
Stinkin’ to high heaven
There may be images of dead animals here, so Cindy should push play and then minimize the window.
Dear Clusterflock
You know how when you don’t send back your census form or if you do it wrong they send someone to your house? I’m gonna do that. Training is next week.
Sia – Breathe Me
This is just what I was listening to.
The blessing of a terrible memory
Sometimes I forget things. In fact it happens pretty frequently. This improves my mood when, for example, I open the fridge and find chocolate milk. I’m easily amused. I get very sad when I think about the other side of this coin, though. I imagine an older woman on her birthday, children and grandchildren around her, and she is so confused as to why her (late) husband hasn’t arrived yet.
This is what I was thinking about.
