Offer: Elmo toy

Posted to the Dubuque Freecycle list:

Chicken Dance Elmo. A little dirty, but works.

Sent from my Verizon Wireless smartphone

dear clusterflock

I don’t mean to go around hawking my wares, but this seemed so relevant and useful to you personally that I thought it would be wrong not to share it. Please keep in mind that I am financially involved with this offer, but even so I think you’ll find I was right to share this marvelous opportunity with you today.

Well now here I’ve wasted a lot of your time with technicalities and jibber jabber, I’ll come to my point quickly. Let me ask you just one question:

Have you ever wanted to have a spleen named after you?

headline of the day, II

Paula Deen confirms that she has type 2 diabetes, unveils partnership with drug company

Not my super-heroine persona,

but I am thinking that somebody should assume the mantle of The Sanitizer.

headline of the day

Did Purell Pay to Appear in the ‘Dragon Tattoo’ Torture Scene?

Uncomfortable Plot Summaries

HARRY POTTER: Celebrity Jock thinks rules don’t apply to him, is right.

(via @johndiesattheen)

from the moderated comments

Davis baking powder is a NY Metro area regional favorite. Hearth Club is currently being sold by Dollar Tree Corp both online and in brick-and-mortar Dollar Tree and their Deals stores for $1 for 8.1 ounces. Most of the store brand baking powder around here is also made by Clabber Girl Corp. If someone has access to a food chemistry lab, it should be fairly easy to assay the contents of the various brands. My guess is that they vary the portions of ingredients for each brand. But I have been wrong about these kinds before, i.e., except for Rumford, they could all be the same stuff.

An Introduction

My car is a Kia.

I drive to IKEA.

I had Chick-fil-A for lunch.

attack ads

I was always taught that before you criticize someone else, you should look at yourself. So let me admit up front that I’m completely disgusting: there’s not much worse than a cockroach. You know what is worse? The emerald cockroach wasp. They have what some people would call an interesting appearance, with a metallic blue body and red legs, but they reproduce by stinging us and using us as hosts for their larvae, which then consume our internal organs in such a matter that we stay alive just long enough to give them life. That kind of behavior demonstrates a real lack of respect for private property rights, and is also unthinkably gross.

image out of context

Mrs. Fisher dreamed of Heaven.

And in Mrs. Fisher’s Heaven, Mr. Peanut was God, and his Son was a Spud. And the Son of God wore a bellboy’s cap upon His head, and He so loved the little children that He wrenched their arms from out the sockets and extended his sprouts unto them, and they danced in a ring. And the Son of God was merry, and the Son of God was ashamed.

The world of the heterosexual

Commentary courtesy of Aunt Ida (Edith Massey), “Female Trouble” (John Waters).

Tomorrow, it’s one day closer to the White House

If you haven’t already seen this Herman Cain campaign ad, you owe it to yourself to take a look. It’s no Demon Sheep, but still.

Offer — White Styrofoam Coolers Westside of Dubuque

Posted to Dubuque Freecycle list:

Have 6 extra white styrofoam coolers that Kansas City meats come in.

headline of the day

Netflix Doesn’t Own the Qwikster Twitter Feed. This Foulmouthed Pothead Does.

John Jay on Creativity

via Wanken via Ollie Judge

quote out of context

And then, obviously, because I am perverse, I was put off it by its ubiquity and other people’s enthusiasm. Others’ loss of perspective about its merits made me lose my own. Maybe I was trying to lower the average human opinion of the oeuvre closer to what it deserves by artificially forcing mine well below that level. Incidentally, this is where the parallels with my view of football end: even if that were a struggling minority sport only played by a few hundred enthusiastic amateurs, I would still consider it an overrated spectacle that lures vital funding away from snooker.

hat tip: Sarah

Dear ‘The Situation’, the situation is…

Abercrombie says a connection to The Situation goes against the “aspirational nature” of its brand and may be “distressing” to customers. The Ohio-based retailer says it has offered a “substantial payment” to Sorrentino and producers of the MTV show so he’ll wear something else.

things found while walking my dog, part one

Macklemore and Ryan Lewis – WINGS

via Josh Helfferich

Artifice and foam rubber

In fact, so much artifice and foam rubber is often used to create the sexually alluring woman that it’s sometimes difficult to know where the lady ends and the foam rubber begins.

Via dangerous minds by way of Roger Ebert.

photo out of context

A Detailed Account of the Raid on bin Ladin

On the morning of Sunday, May 1st, White House officials cancelled scheduled visits, ordered sandwich platters from Costco, and transformed the Situation Room into a war room. At eleven o’clock, Obama’s top advisers began gathering around a large conference table. A video link connected them to Panetta, at C.I.A. headquarters, and McRaven, in Afghanistan.

Brigadier General Marshall Webb, an assistant commander of JSOC, took a seat at the end of a lacquered table in a small adjoining office and turned on his laptop. He opened multiple chat windows that kept him, and the White House, connected with the other command teams. The office where Webb sat had the only video feed in the White House showing real-time footage of the target, which was being shot by an unarmed RQ 170 drone flying more than fifteen thousand feet above Abbottabad.

It’s the most detailed account of the raid I’ve seen, and includes the months of preparation that went into the mission. Plus, the surveillance details, like those above, add some technological flavor, but don’t seem to confirm the suspicion of real-time helmet cameras.

Oscar Mayer. It doesn’t get better than this.

Oscar Mayer Sandwich Combos are one of the five unique varieties of Adult Lunch Combos.

Cindy tipped me to this, and I have been snorting ever since.

That’s a lot of points

To mark the resignation of Sir Paul Stephenson as head of the Metropolitan Police, the London Times used a record-breaking 164-point bold headline:

via Ben Schott and Jon Hill.

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