In Which I Proclaim My Love for Sarah
Everything changed the night I saw Sarah speak at the Republican National Convention. I was captivated by her passion, her perkiness, her adorably flat accent. Wouldn’t I just love to hear her say my name — to call me her own special “bad guy”? You betcha.
I have already composed a list of nearly three hundred catch phrases and special little pet-names we can use to ignite exchanges of whispers, giggles, and knowing looks with each other. I can’t wait.
Bush Ratings Lower Than Pirates, Wall St. Brokers
Washington, DC — Embattled U.S. President George W. Bush continues his long, slow decline into history’s dumpster.
A new Gallup poll places Mr. Bush’s current approval rating somewhere between Brussels sprouts and explosive diarrhea.
“The Administration’s handling of foreign affairs and the events leading up to the current financial crisis is taking a toll on President Bush’s credibility,” senior pollster R. Kevin Buck told news agencies Thursday. “It’s like watching a monkey trying to fuck a football.”
Team of Mavericks
League of non-conformists.
Alliance of loners.
Gaggle of rebels.
Coalition of dissenters.
Neither side supports Gay Marriage!
I don’t either. Don’t call it Marriage! I don’t give a crap about what it’s called. But I want the same legal recognition for my commitment to my partner. Marriage is word play, why can’t we get past it?
The Poetry of Sarah Palin
“Outside”
I am a Washington outsider.
I mean,
Look at where you are.
I’m a Washington outsider.I do not have those allegiances
To the power brokers,
To the lobbyists.
We need someone like that.
How much money can you make if you REALLY fuck up?
CEO pay: What those involved in the financial meltdown made
As Congress considers a $700 billion bailout for Wall Street and the banking sector, there are calls to restrict the pay and severance packages for CEOs at investment houses, banks and mortgage lenders poised to be benefit from the plan put forward by U.S. Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson and Federal Reserve chairman Ben Bernanke.
Executives from some of the major investment and commercial banks involved in the financial upheaval and bailout earned hefty paychecks last year, according to proxy statements outlining their salaries, bonuses and stock options:
Poll: McCain Old and White, Obama Young and Black
“We accumulate plenty of raw data,” said thirty-year veteran statistician Nelson Temple of Scranton, PA, “even when we don’t embroider reality with made up bullshit. The tough part is making sense of it.”
“This week,” he continued, “49% of those surveyed indicate Governor Sarah Palin is not as hot as they first thought, yet 47% are convinced she is hotter than ever. With a 3% margin of error, what am I supposed to do with that?”
Sarah Palin Bags a Big One
By Zina Saunders.
Why American Diplomacy Doesn’t Work
ISLAMABAD, Pakistan — A U.S. missile strike Wednesday in Pakistan further inflamed relations between the two anti-terrorism allies, just hours after the American military chief vowed to “respect Pakistan’s sovereignty.” See here.
Candidates Waging Battle of Quotes, Sources Say
New York, NY — It’s never been more difficult to separate whining from substance. America’s 2008 presidential race is fully engaged, but truth and credibility are not.
The road to the White House is littered with the corpses of shattered reality and common decency — casualties of one of the ugliest, nastiest major U.S. elections since 2004.
Don’t let flocking make you stupid.
Y’all? Sorry I haven’t been around much. I’m doing this work-and-school thing, you know? And all my blog-reading time has been completely soaked up. But I did want to respond to something from over in yesterday’s open thread, where Jake wrote,
I mean this in all seriousness, since I was seven when Dukakis coughed up a 30 point lead. Is this the beginning of a meltdown, or is this something where people who see this as ridiculous on its face [are] just having a really good time with this?
I’m in Spain and kind of self-select my media through RSS. What kind of serious discussion is this getting Stateside?
and Cindy replied,
Jake, after 8 years of Bush/Cheney, it takes a lot of stupid to bring on a meltdown. I will say, though, that I was happy to find colleagues at work discussing the interview when I arrived today, and it was featured on NPR this morning.
So. At school on Tuesday, in a class that has a different guest speaker every week, we had a great session with Ethan Zuckerman, whose basic argument was that while the Internet provides us with this unprecedented ability to exchange ideas with people from all over the world, in fact what tends to happen is that we hang out online with people who have very similar lifestyles, values, and opinions as ourselves. And so sometimes we don’t realize that everybody else doesn’t think the way we do until it’s too late. He gave as an example the profound astonishment and disappointment of Howard Dean supporters in 2004. Insert your candidate of choice here. Read more
Nothing Left to Lose…Except….
Pakistani public opinion was already incensed by the U.S. airstrikes into its territory, which have intensified over the last few weeks and have killed civilians as well as militants. That turned to uproar after the first ground assault by U.S. commandos onto its soil earlier this month, in South Waziristan, another part of the tribal territory that runs along the Afghan border. The country was stunned over a New York Times report this week President Bush had secretly authorized the new policy of incursions into Pakistan in July.
It’s just an outrage (sadly one of many) that this administration, in its lame last days, would risk so much for the potential feather of a big “kill” that would benefit McCain and a bankrupt party. There are new people running Pakistan, and what a wonderful start we are getting at enlisting their help. I guess Bush hasn’t heard that they are a nuclear power, and this makes “kick ass and take names later” diplomacy much more dangerous. I recall Republicans decrying Obama’s notion of going into Pakistan to get Bin Laden–but of course Obama’s comment referred to knowing exactly where Bin Laden was, taking him out, and then smoothing the ruffled feathers–not just generally going in whenever for a look-see and blowing up a bunch of crap up without achieving much.
The Bush Years
(via boing boing)
fiscal responsibility
Pretend for a moment I’m Governor of a small state. Also, pretend I was elected on a platform of reform and fiscal responsibility. Now pretend I spent 300 nights of my first year and half in office at home and I billed the state a per diem for each of those nights. Do I have any credibility left?
So what do we do?
The McCain campaign’s ability to frame their message around a series of demonstrable lies is only possible because most of the press takes an agnostic position on whether his messages and ads are true or not. But if the press won’t, don’t we need to stop relying on the mainstream press to make that point? That’s a very tall proposition. But this is a pattern we’ve seen cycle after cycle. Complaining about it only achieves a sort meaningless moral victory.
How do we fix this? A large section of the populace believes Iraq was involved in 9/11. McCain can frame his discussion around the surge because of this. The facts are completely at odds with the narrative. Again, how do we fix this?
Lower Stories: Patrick in Dayton
Patrick is a Web developer for a large Internet retailer. He is a big, shuffling, bearded guy with dark-rimmed eyeglasses and lots of curly hair. Patrick doesn’t speak much, so it was surprising he initiated a conversation right there at the vending machine.
Patrick bought cookies and talked about how a million United Nations troops are massed in the U.S. The soldiers are waiting for their signal to begin rounding up people. Dissenters and undesirables will be transported on buses and railroad cars to internment camps already set up out west.
“It will be like Nazi Germany,” Patrick says.
Which Cup Is the Old Bean Under?
Last night I heard a front man for McCain bring out a pitch that’s making the rounds: Sure, McCain has had to court the extreme right in order to firm up his base, but maybe when he gets in, the old moderate McCain will reappear. This having-it-both-ways argument suggests an amazing basis for deciding one’s vote: Let’s hope that a man will betray his supporters, once he gets what he wants, and will then turn out to be on our side–and presumably won’t betray us. This probably doesn’t seem odd to Republicans, because their “faith” (all of it) is generated and sustained by public relations concerns. Their goal makes hucksters of them, and they long ago lost the ability to feel shame or a sense of accountability. Hence the ease with which they can argue: “My party screwed everything up over the last eight years…and that’s why we are the ones who can and should be given the chance to make repairs” and “I’m a Washington outsider who has worked in Washington for twenty-six years–but I’m ready, now, to jump in there and pull the rug out from under all those people I have worked with.”
At every turn, McCain demonstrates the ways in which democracy may be destroyed from within. And once this process is set in motion, simple honesty, by itself, is at best an experimental chemotherapy.
There’s a Party in My Pants
Wednesday, September 3
11:40AM Yes, I got here late. What a night I had. Three women at my hotel asked me if I wanted a massage. I thought they were hookers but it turns out they were delegates from Indiana. One in particular had skills — and strong hands like a farmer’s wife. She told me she attended her first GOP convention in 1972 when Nixon won his second nomination. Unlike that sordid affair, last night had a happy ending.
Nude Photos Sidetrack McCain Campaign
The 2008 Republican National Convention has had its share of twists and turns so far.
Much like Mr. McCain’s sluggish White House bid, hurricane Gustav launched itself upon the United States with less force than predicted. Many RNC events and speakers were postponed or cancelled in anticipation of Katrina v2.0 — including plans for Ms. Palin to pop out of a comically large cake while clad in a skimpy swimsuit.
Experienced observers of jacked-up elections admit that Ms. Palin might not be hot enough to ride out the ever-growing storm of criticism that surrounds her, leaving the embattled Mr. McCain no option except to throw her under the wheels of his “Straight Talk Express” bus.
Clusterdouche, Redesigned! Huzzah!
One of my favorite sites. I’ve linked to them before. These guys are the happy warriors in the campaign against douchebaggery. Spiffy facelift and lots of new content. Not for the faint of heart or anyone who thinks the Earth is less than 5,000 years old.
Catering the Rapture
Special Report — I think about food too much. I know I do. I acquired the tendency honestly.
When I was a little critter growing up in the compound, my mother elected herself nutritionist for our entire breakaway republic. There’s no telling what Mom would have achieved as Dietician-General if our fifty-two member group had seceded from the United States.
McCain VP Hot Pick is Hot Chick
Elected in 2006 as governor of a state that has a population density lower than outer space, the former basketball player and beauty queen acquired the nickname “Sarah Barracuda” for her competitive ferocity in pageant competitions.
This sexiest bright hope of conservatives once kilt a grizzly with her bare hands, and was awarded the mayoralty of Wasilla, one of Alaska’s least-amusingly named cities, as first prize for winning the famous Iditarod dogsled race in 1996.
North Korean Propaganda Posters
Click the picture for more (via kottke)
because if terrorists can’t buy guns, the terrorists have won
A top McCain adviser lobbied against a bill that would keep people on the terrorist watch list from buying guns.
Newsweek reports that, according to registration documents filed by Scheuenemann’s lobbying firm, Orion Strategies, Scheunemann lobbied on behalf of the National Shooting Sports Foundation (NSSF) against a bill that aims to close a gun-control loophole that inhibits the government from stopping people on terrorist watch-lists from buying guns. According to Newsweek, “the bill was inspired by an official audit covering a five-month period in 2004 which found that, because of the loophole, the Feds had to greenlight 35 out of 44 cases where a gun buyer was on a terrorist watch list.”
Democratic Convention: Everyone Forgot the Potato Salad
Former President Jimmy Carter, comfortable in his new role of elder statesman and hobbyist diplomat, warned on Monday that his fellow Democrats need to “smarten up” and “stop acting like little bitches.”
“Americans want change, prosperity, and international prestige,” said Mr. Carter, who history will remember as being a much better ex-president than president. “Unfortunately, the Democratic leadership sometimes acts like it couldn’t even organize an explosion at a fireworks factory.”