A Little Skipper…
Reminded me, by way of Jean in Deron’s post.
Seems I’ve failed to embed it. Nor link it for that matter. Nevermind. It isn’t that good. Don’t take up your time.
dear clusterflock
I don’t mean to go around hawking my wares, but this seemed so relevant and useful to you personally that I thought it would be wrong not to share it. Please keep in mind that I am financially involved with this offer, but even so I think you’ll find I was right to share this marvelous opportunity with you today.
Well now here I’ve wasted a lot of your time with technicalities and jibber jabber, I’ll come to my point quickly. Let me ask you just one question:
Have you ever wanted to have a spleen named after you?
dueling banjos
Probably the thing I like least about Jane Fonda is during the Vietnam War she put Ho before bros.
— Andy Levy (@andylevy) December 30, 2011
Sometimes I feel like Bob Seger is trying a little TOO hard to convince us he had sex in high school.
— Sean Thomason (@TheThomason) December 30, 2011
tweet of the day
“Nobody cares about science anymore. They want feelings instead of facts!” “How do you know?” “I got a hunch.”
— Zach Weiner (@ZachWeiner) December 23, 2011
you are going to need this eventually…
for that email or IM conversation, I just know it.
attack ads
I was always taught that before you criticize someone else, you should look at yourself. So let me admit up front that I’m completely disgusting: there’s not much worse than a cockroach. You know what is worse? The emerald cockroach wasp. They have what some people would call an interesting appearance, with a metallic blue body and red legs, but they reproduce by stinging us and using us as hosts for their larvae, which then consume our internal organs in such a matter that we stay alive just long enough to give them life. That kind of behavior demonstrates a real lack of respect for private property rights, and is also unthinkably gross.
New Christmas Catalog Price List
There are a bunch of good’uns.
Excerpt with minimal context
She looked up at him with a question in her eyes. “Did you get the graham crackers?”
“Yes,” he answered.
She moved toward him in her old slippers. He thought they looked like rabbits.
The Wingman
As a few of you know, my wife is the packaging engineer for Leatherman Tools. They just released this entertaining video to promote their new tool, the Wingman:
A few weeks ago, she found this sitting on her desk in the morning.
In case you were tired of cats…
Previously on clusterflock.
Love Candy
“cause that’s how science works”
via, of all people, Justin Timberlake
things found while walking my dog, part one
headline of the day III
The White House just Rickrolled a Twitter user
the 2011 Bulwer-Lytton winner
Cheryl’s mind turned like the vanes of a wind-powered turbine, chopping her sparrow-like thoughts into bloody pieces that fell onto a growing pile of forgotten memories.
(via Coudal)
This Monday’s Puddin’ is nicely concise
You’ve Been Eminent Domain’d
I guess this is what you get when you put an extension on a house this close to the ever-widening DC beltway, but man… I still feel bad for these folks.
The Bears Are Right Attracted to Their Menses
Joad Cressbeckler: Homosexuality A Necessity On Cold Mountaintops
Finally, a new Cressbeckler Stance.
And if you believe the Earth was given to you to kick ass on while gloating? You’re not really a Christian…you’re a Texan
Quote out of context
Finally, coming close to my threshold for pain, I asked the chef, “How do I know when it’s done?” I waited expectantly for his wisdom. With a mischievous glint in his eye he smiled, and said “When the sweat starts pouring down the crack of your ass.”
Zombie Sister Smackdown is Come For Her Flock
(Well, for Cindy anyway…)
A Magnet Laboratory (1959)
Directed by the late Richard Leacock for the Educational Development Corporation as part of the Physical Science Study Committee (PSSC) series of films.
I hope at least one or two people watch this twenty-minute gem of an “educational film,” wherein half a dozen MIT researchers set out to demonstrate the power of electromagnets and inadvertently spark a brief fire.
Also, partway through the film, the phone rings off-screen, interrupting Francis Bitter’s concentration on busbars. “Tell ‘em to call me back later — I’m busy,” he says.
If you like this sort of thing, this is the sort of thing you’ll like. There’s actually a lot going on here.
I’m sorry…
Danny started this tonight. I couldn’t help but play along.
In the sixties, my brother and I once owned an Allen Sherman album. We prided ourselves on memorizing the lyrics to his songs. At any given moment, I can pull this one out of memory. Danny’s heard me enough, he can pull most of it out himself.
Weird Al Yankovic don’t have nothing on Sherman.
I wish there were an “I’m sorry” category.
the entirety of human conversation in eleven sentences
From Medium Large
Fare thee well, Jane Russell (1921-2011)
Ain’t there anyone here for love?
