The story:

An Oklahoma judicial candidate is fending off a political attack from his daughter, who has taken out a local newspaper ad urging voters: “Do not vote for my dad!”

The web site:

We are shocked both by the extent and the nature of the media coverage this story has generated. And we completely agree with Mr. Mantooth that the voters should look at his experience and record when deciding how to cast their vote for District Judge. It is our sincere hope that you will examine this record for which we’ve provide the limited examples available to us and make an appropriate and informed decision.

The chocolate:

Back in 2004, I asked Mr. Mantooth what kind of father would give his daughter the gift of worm-ridden chocolates for Christmas. He offered no reply. Today, I would suggest that the question the voters of District 21 should be asking is, “if this is what Mr. Mantooth gives to his children, what would he give the people of District 21?”

For the information of your readers – I am the person who played the mother in Cindy and Donna. My stage name was: Suzy Allen. I never used the name Susy Allen and any information shown for Susy Allen does not apply to me. I don’t know why I was not credited properly. I agree that Cindy and Donna was a terrible movie, but the stagehands and crew said I was the best actor in the movie! We spent an entire day filming one scene, with me and my “husband” driving on a freeway, with me nagging him about not taking me out often enough !! I had a lot of fun trying to be the whining, miserable wife for the movie, even though in real life I am nothing like that character. It was also very interesting for me to have to dub in some of my lines after the movie was finished. Quite a challenge to get everything right on cue.

Context.

(thanks, Robert)

Librarian: “Huh?”

Caller: “I was convicted of thieft, egg assault, drug possession, and conceal-weapon.  They found thangs on me, but it was not mine! So which crimes will the judge use to decide whether or not I can get a name change?”

A kid runs onto the field at Camden Yards and they definitely don’t tase him, bro.

LONDON (AFP) – The head of the American Association of Professors accused BP Friday of trying to buy the silence of scientists and academics to protect itself after the Gulf oil spill, in a BBC interview.

“This is really one huge corporation trying to buy faculty silence in a comprehensive way,” said Cary Nelson.

Puppet factories: depending upon respect for argumentation while undermining its better uses. What methods are best for confronting the results of such efforts, when charges of hypocricy and bias are immediately knocked down by the rushing flood of tendentious speech?

If the Jewish novelist, who wrote in German while living in Prague, had had his way, the boxes would not exist. Shortly before his death from tuberculosis in 1924, Kafka wrote to his friend Max Brod: “Dearest Max, my last request: everything I leave behind me … in the way of diaries, manuscripts, letters … [is] to be burned unread.” Brod refused to heed his dying friend’s wish, saying it puzzled him. In 1939, on the eve of the Nazi invasion, he smuggled two suitcases of material to Palestine. During the Suez crisis in 1956, he moved parts of the archive to Switzerland. His action saved the manuscripts of The Castle, The Trial and Amerika.

The rest were in a Zurich bank vault opened Monday.

The act makes it unlawful to falsely represent, verbally or in writing “to have been awarded any decoration or medal authorized by Congress for the Armed Forces of the United States, any of the service medals or badges awarded to the members of such forces, the ribbon, button, or rosette of any such badge, decoration, or medal, or any colorable imitation of such item.”

The government, which is mulling an appeal, argued that the law should be upheld.

“By allowing anyone to claim to possess such decorations, could impact the motivation of soldiers to engage in valorous, and extremely dangerous, behavior on the battlefield,” the government wrote.

Judge Blackburn was not buying it.

I got a 3m30s voicemail along the same lines this afternoon. Have posted it here.

Oddly enough it came from Burma / Myanmar.

Petitioner:  Can you tell me what’s the next step after I filed a paternity case?

Librarian: Did you do the next part — motion for genetic testing?

Petitioner:  No, because she’s deceased.