shark-bitten crocodile poop fossils
Paleontologists have stumbled across a scientific first that’s sure to inspire both fascination and disgust: coprolites, or fossilized fecal matter, bearing the distinct impressions of a creature’s teeth.
The coprolites — one chunk of rock is fist-sized, the other is about 30 percent larger — were discovered on a beach along the western shore of Chesapeake Bay, says Stephen Godfrey, a paleontologist at the Calvert Marine Museum in Solomons, Md.
You’re welcome.
Something has been bothering me.
I have my facts about religious holidays straight: Christmas is about Santa and a tree; Halloween is ghouls, death, and candy; Independence Day is about how God loves America best; and Easter, perhaps the most holy of them, is the season of the Reese’s Peanut Butter Egg.
This year, with this commercial, the good people at Hershey have inspired me to plumb the depths of origin of that most sacred of symbols, their hallowed peanut butter egg.
I Should Kick Myself
The entry into the garage. We had new siding put on the house three…four? years ago. At the time, they also put in new garage doors with openers, new windows in the media room (a 10′x25′ room on the south side of the house). Why I didn’t include this door in the deal is a mystery to me. I remember thinking, “Ooo, this is too much money.” But, honestly, what would another three or four hundred dollars have done to the loan, lien on the house over the course of fifteen years?
Nevermind the decaying concrete ruined by ten years of throwing “snow-melt” on top of it, that now needs to be ripped out and replaced. “All in good time,” I keep thinking. “All in good time.” And then there’s the landscaping. Oh, fuck it. The shoemaker’s kids go without shoes.
Corporations rock the vote
I’m a big fan of modest proposals:
I’m highly impressed with your recent decision to vaporize limits on corporate political spending. It’s the kind of campaign finance reform our ailing res publica needs. In fact, I found it so inspirational, here’s an even better idea.
Let’s give corporations the right to vote. One share, one vote. The logic? It’s simple. Corporations are people; all people are created equal; ergo, corporations must have equal rights — and no right is more important than the right to vote. (Well, maybe the right to buy fully automatic machine guns, but that’s another story).
Goldman Sachs, for example, has 514,080,000 shares outstanding — so they’d get 514 millon votes (in fact, maybe we should give them more, because they’re so smart). Ford has 3.31 billion shares outstanding, so they’d get approximately 2.8 billion more votes than Goldman.
Of course, we won’t have achieved parity until Bank of America can get crotch-cupped at the airport.
seriously
the first legal male prostitute
I think for a male, if you want to be successful in this type of venture, you’re not a prostitute. You’re a surrogate lover. You encompass everything that’s required of you—not only emotionally, physically—but psychologically. Because women are wired differently. They’re much more sensitive creatures. You actually have to enjoy what you do. You can’t necessarily say, “Oh, it’s just a job.” You actually have to say it’s a passion. I think it’s the same situation as with anything that happens when you break apart a social institution. There has to be some kind of change in terminology to describe persons like myself. And it’s more of a civil rights thing now. Basically this is the first time in the economy of the United States that a male has actually stood up and said, “I want to do this for a living.” And be protected under law to do it. It’s just the same as when Rosa Parks decided to sit at the front instead of the back. She was proclaiming her rights as a disadvantaged, African-American older woman. And I’m doing the same. I’m actually standing up now, and hopefully I can be supported by the male community and be understood as a person. This actually isn’t about selling my body. This is about changing social norms.
Congratulations.
(via marginal revolution)
from the spam
His privy chamber was provided and furnished with a chair of state placed upon a carpet, with a cloth of state hang’d over it, newly made for the same purpose.
What Cindy Just Said
Well fuck my rubber anus under the fold.
Rembrandt in the bathroom
The Very Rev. David M. O’Connell found a Rembrandt in his bathroom.
In the frame was a tiny etching of an old man with an unruly beard and billowing hat, composed of thousands of fine lines. His eyes are tired. His head nods toward his chest.
The piece is signed “Rembrandt.”
The Very.
Vimeo Sued By Capitol Records Over Lip Dubs
I am surprised, actually, it didn’t happen sooner:
If anything better underlines my point it’s an email I received from Sean Nelson, the frontman of the band Harvey Danger, whose song Flagpole Sitta we’ve now infamously lip-dubbed:
That Flagpole Sitta video made me incredibly happy, just when I thought there was NOTHING that could make me listen to that song again. A thousand thank you’s.
Capitol, you’re a bunch of goof-balls. This lawsuit is the tactical equivalent to pooping on someone’s birthday cake.
My Favorite Pit Toilet
Ever. (Tapley Woods. Jo Daviess County, Illinois. US of A.)
monkey Shakespeare
If you sit monkeys at a computer, will they type the works of the Bard? No, they will partially destroy the machine, use it as a lavatory and mostly type the letter “s”.
it’s one of those life changing books
When each bucket in his five bathrooms is full, he empties it in the compost pile in his backyard in rural Pennsylvania. Eventually he takes the resulting soil and spreads it over his vegetable garden as fertilizer.
Luby’s Closing 8 Dallas-Fort Worth Cafeterias
Just days after posting a $23 million loss, Houston-based Luby’s said it is closing eight of its 21 cafeteria locations in North Texas.
The chain will shutter four locations in Tarrant County (South Arlington, Bedford, Grapevine and Fort Worth), three in Dallas and one in Denton.
This is distressing news.
More later.
Cast y’all’s votes, y’all.
Should I be the next Oprah?
Slaybell Slapdown
For Deron
(via oneplusinfinity)
a wild cat did prowl?
The state of Missouri has an eight person cougar response team and, apparently, zero cougars.
Missouri needs an eight-member cougar team because it, like other nearly cougarless states, has a bad case of “cougar hysteria,” as Mr. Beringer puts it. Of the 765 cougar reports Missouri has received since 2005, only two have been verified.
The state of Michigan has a cougar scat spat.
Dr. Rusz calls the rebuttal study “a politically inspired off-the-cuff attack” that “didn’t take into account the physical nature of our scat,” which was up to an inch-and-a-half in diameter.
More cougar-related controversy here.
An Irish bullock, mid-stampede
This is probably the most evocative image from our recent neighbourhood adventure.
Pooping, Japanese Style
Thought Deron might enjoy this… the options on our toilet at our first hotel in Tokyo:
The difference between “Spray” & “Bidet” was subtle, but noticeable. Basically, as you might expect, though spray might better be called high-powered jet nozzle.
An additional feature not listed is the initial automatic courtesy flush to avoid embarrassing noises. Apparently this comes standard with all Japanese toilets.
Here’s our toilet now in Kyoto:
I haven’t had a chance to try the “oscillating” feature yet.
The only place I have seen such well-equipped toilets in the states is at Hisake in NYC.
2012
I came back from England last year and, man, they had me fed up with this stuff.
Modular bathroom
It’s my poop in a box.
(via Ainsley Drew at kottke)
you’re welcome
The females emerge from the anus at night to lay their eggs.
Looking for a Pen that will Grade Papers
“This is the tragic story of a man who’s essay writes about his events.”
flipping the bird, constitutionally
The legal rights of those of us who have a need to flip the bird or yell at toilets.
The problem is not confined to Pittsburgh. In 2007, a woman in Scranton, Pa., was cited for yelling obscenities at an overflowing toilet in her home – a tirade overheard by her neighbor, an off-duty police officer. She was later acquitted on constitutional grounds, and the city paid her a $19,000 settlement. “We probably handle a dozen of these cases every year,” Walczak says. “We’re actually negotiating with the state police right now, trying to force them to change their training and written materials to make clear you can’t do this.”