InBev Buys Fannie Mae, Freddie Mac
“Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac have endured troubled times lately,” said InBev CEO Carlos Brito, “but that will change now that they have joined our corporate family. A little tweaking, some layoffs — there is no limit to what we can achieve together.”
“We often make our expansion decisions based on brand equity,” Mr. Brito added. “However, in this particular case the first thing we will do is change those incredibly stupid company names.”
Imaginary Madonna Video: “Scroggins To The Oldies”
Weakened in Paradise
I always believed my best bet for employment was the service sector, but it hasn’t worked out the way I expected. I’ll never give up intelligence-gathering, covert surveillance, and stalking as hobbies, of course, but ever since Big Government became more deeply involved in those fields I’m finding it much more difficult to make a living pursuing the observational arts.
